Lexapro and risperdone

[PSYCHO_METAL_X]

So I'm on these and at first they were really helping but now it's like they've worn off or something. I still want to die and last night I had a bout of manic psychosis that ended in me punching and elbowing my fridge so hard I was sore this morning. I cant believe I let them convince me to put this shit in my body. It wouldnt be so bad if it weren't for the constant agonizing boredom. Never even had a fucking shot in this life and now I'm just suffering. My family (who just decided they could be bothered enough to acknowledge that I'm dying) is also getting fed up with the fact that I cant support myself as if it isnt their fault, fucking narcissists.