Venting Leeched for too long. Coming to terms with ctb

[patheticpartner]

I'm too uninterested and too lazy to live. I'm bullshitting my way through university to buy time and get free money from financial aid and scholarships. All I enjoy is eating and vomiting out food.

I played with the idea of becoming a child-free housewife to avoid working for money, but I'm too shameful to commit to a leech-like lifestyle forever. I want to put an end to my wasteful, idle existence soon.

I'm planning to follow the 48-hour SN regimen with just antacids and painkillers. I'll deprive myself of sleep for as long as possible, lay in a glade at the national park, take the SN, and attempt to doze through the dying process.

I wish I was never born so that my parents wouldn't have to suffer the death of one of their children. They deserve nothing but happiness, and I wish could've provided them with a more positive outcome.

 

[BluesRunTheGame]

Yes it's hard to imagine me contributing to society any time soon. I managed to get four and a half years of uni with loans I'm never going to pay back. Uninterested is a good word.

 

[xkonstantinexx]

I hope you find what you're looking for..

 

[FuneralCry]

This life really is exhausting, I wish I was never born too. If this is the option you want then I wish you peace.

 

[offshoreserver]

I played with the idea of becoming a child-free housewife to avoid working for money, but I'm too shameful to commit to a leech-like lifestyle forever. I want to put an end to my wasteful, idle existence soon.

there is absolutely no shame in women being housewives. it's not leech-like, even without children. women should be free to have a career if they choose, but ultimately there are many people who would love a stay-at-home wife to take care of the house. shame is a very human thing, but if you work on self-acceptance, it will make you happier to be alive whether you ctb or not. you don't have to be constantly working or producing something to be of value to people or to the world