Leaving Behind a Disabled Child

[Breathless]

I have a young child who is severely autistic. It is likely that they will need significant support throughout their lifetime. I am married and my parents are still alive so my child would still have strong support for a while after I'm gone. I know that my child does not need me specifically and that I can't protect them indefinitely anyway. Still, I wonder if having me around would be better for them.
My first attempt to catch the bus was when I was 12. I am much older now and I'm pretty sure that my desire to CTB will never go away. Years of talk therapy and medication just haven't changed the fact that I loathe myself and that life is unending and pointless.
Has anyone successfully reconciled something like this?

 

[JakeFlake]

Do you have someone you trust who will look after the child?

Are you able to leave behind sufficient money to support the child till he/she is independent?

 

[Dizzylady80]

That's really rough, Breathless. Catching the bus will definitely have a negative effect in your child, even indirectly like how it will effect your child's gaurdians. If you're thinking about this it might be important to see if there have been studies on this situation, and obviously it's incredibly important to make sure your child is taken care of and is in good hands. Are your parents good people? And will your spouse or parents look out for your child when they're older?