knowing i have my seat on the bus makes me feel euphoric

[sunnybird]

no more stressing over my job (I made a mistake the other day, it was so nice and refreshing to just feel "oh, that sucks...oh well") and no more feeling guilty about ignoring school work.

I can enjoy watching shows like it's always sunny in philadelphia and psych all day. it is my birthday weekend so I can enjoy a nice birthday dinner with my best friend, read some of my old favorite fanfics, listen to my favorite music. I stay up late at night to enjoy reading/watching/doing things for one last time. I can binge on the food I like cause it's not like I need to stay healthy for anything. I can wear my favorite perfume (which I usually save for special events) all day around the house because it's not like I need to save it. I don't need to exercise or contemplate life too much. the 48 hours are just going to be me enjoying life and then hopefully falling into a permenant sleep.

I don't think I have ever let this happy in years

 

[occamsrazor]

I'm delighted for you. Your last days sound perfect. If you need to talk to anyone I am here even if it's just for me to listen. May I ask is your method N or SN? Or maybe I am not reading the context clues correctly

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope you enjoy your time. I am pleased for you that you feel happy, I have no idea what happiness would feel like. I do believe it can be comforting for many people knowing their suffering is coming to an end, more than anything I would like non existence. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[deletednumber]

I too feel a sense of happiness and euphoria every time someone contacts me for ctb together and we organize ourselves for a ctb plan ... having a date and a plan calms me a lot and I feel a sense of peace within me