It's Friday, I'm in love!!!

[WornOutLife]

Suicidal thoughts, anxiety, panic attacks, worries and so on love to torture me every single day! I just put lots of pressure on myself.

HOWEVER, Fridays, in spite of having to work, I start feeling way better because I have this euphoria knowing that in a few hours I'll just be free so, the key is to do my best during the week days so as to really enjoy my weekends!

I'm practically listening to "Friday, I'm in love" by The Cure every single day. I feel soooooo related to that song!

Here, I'll change some parts, which are terrible in comparison to the original version but it's how I feel about the days of the week:

"Monday you can fall apart,
Tuesday, Wednesday I'm too anxious,
Oh Thursday, doesn't even start and it's soooo long
It's Friday, I'M IN LOVE!!!!!
Saturday....BOOZE!!!
And Sunday is time to rest
But Friday never disappoints me...!"


I have no idea how I'm still alive in spite of wanting to ctb impulsively from time to time.
I guess not having a method and not wanting to leave my dad alone in this world (or kill him from a heart-attack or stroke) is what's keeping me here!

Now, it's time to teach some more lessons and then sing, Friday, I'm in love!

Btw, here's the song! Try to listen it! It might cheer you up:

Thanks for reading me!!

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[FuneralCry]

At least you get some enjoyment. It must be hard having to work while dealing with all of that. I don't know why I am still alive either, but I guess there is no easy peaceful ways out.

 

[Jkennedy]

Booze will help me get over the fear of CTB

 

[Ch92921]

OCD thoughts are true keys for wanting ctb. Because I have them I cant anymore.

 

[NormaJeane]

My friday was not so nice. I had to go to the dentist today because a tooth broke last week. The dentist is very expensive in Sweden. I have had a surgery at the dentist three months ago and I have another time at the dentist in 10 days to insert two teeth. In four months, the dentist will cost me 50 000 Swedish crowns.