Discussion is your sasu account too personal?

[eggsausagerice]

something i realized earlier today is that my post is just a thinly veiled blog because i don't anonymize enough details about my life, lol. i feel like i should go through a bigger effort to make my account look like a burner. only have 3 irl friends and my sister would never go here, so i doubt anyone will see my account unless i forget to wipe my laptop data. only my best friend would know me from my posts, since he knows my tone of voice so well. i'm also really verbose in texts, the same way i am here. i'm not really worried about anyone else stumbling across my account.

i kind of talk about everything i have going on, but i try to avoid talking about actual life stuff because then you guys might figure out who i am. i don't have any social media accounts and i'm kind of repulsed by the idea of my face being on the internet at all. i feel a little bad that all my sasu posts will inevitably be forgotten about by the people that read them because they'll leave the site or read posts from new accounts when i go inactive. but i guess that's the nature of the site. i've been thinking about distancing myself from sasu but it's still my second home, since i don't have many friends. i'll really miss the feeling of community on here once i log in for the last time. sasu feels like my first real attempt at having social media (because i hate reddit...). i'm writing this while eating dinner since sasu's become my nightly and morning routine. it would be better if i found something to replace it with, because i still recognize that it's not healthy to always be on a suicide forum. i've been fixated on suicide for so long that i almost can't remember who i was before it. i came on here to research hanging, because that's what a lot of my older posts were about. now i hate hanging and i feel incrediblly frustrated by the idea that suicide was ever supposed to be "easy" in the first place. it took me ages to even step off my stool for a few seconds because i get so scared. a lot of my attempts were just me staring at the noose and hitting the shinji pose on top of my stool because i felt so full of grief. i have a lot of posts talking about feeling embarrassed about it. i kept thinking that "real" suicidal people would just have the strength to do it, but "real" suicide people don't exist. suicidal people are allowed to be alive and not feel guilty for it.

i feel almost wistful reminiscing about the accounts i talked to back in may and early june. none of those people are around anymore. you almost don't notice when accounts stop being active. i'll try to remember to say goodbye once i really do leave, even if i forget that people regularly read my posts and leave comments on them. i know i matter because i still think of those people, even if we barely exchanged messages. being on here constantly will always lead to more rumination than comfort for me, since talking about my thoughts just prolongs their existence in my mind. i think that i've really thrived by having somewhere i can consistently write my thoughts without judgement, but everyone inevitably outgrows being on here. it can just get too depressing being here every day.

 

[MissAbyss]

Same here, it's kind of turning into a sh!tty Facebook page. Ah well, who cares.

 

[eggsausagerice]

it's kind of turning into a sh!tty Facebook page

i think that there should be a sasu account akin to @Pluto that just posts facebook minion memes under people's posts until they get banned

 

[MissAbyss]

i think that there should be a sasu account akin to @Pluto that just posts facebook minion memes under people's posts until they get banned

Great idea! Although, I really love minions. Pls spam my account with it!

 

[glowing.purple.aura]

I'm so addicted as well. I always get so excited to check it in the morning and at night (anddd whenever I feel any sadness). The reason being that people actually acknowledge me on here. No one in my real life talks to me, or even responds to my texts (which is what led to me realizing that I don't have to worry at all about what I post on here—it's not like any of them would ever see it). Part of me hopes it gets brought to light once I CTB so they can finally feel bad for ignoring me so often... even after I attempt they seem to only care about me for a week before going back to not feeling guilty!!!

 

[CaptainSunshine!]

Yeah, I think so. I post details that I deem important, but they could be easily linked back to me by people who know me. However I don't see it as a big issue as it is very unlikely for my family (the only people I talk to anymore) to check this site, let alone understand it (they won't understand English, and they might not bother with Google Translate).

I am alike you in that I wanted to just post a little information asking, but then convinced myself to ask how to deal with emptiness, and now here I am posting whenever I can. I greatly like this site, as the reactions are visible and varied. I can recognize the people reacting and posting, unlike other sites. It feels really homey, like a community. You fear no judgement and can say whatever ails you.

 

[Mr. Snrub]

Yes. To quote George Lucas "I may have gone too far in a few places"

As much as I try to hold back sometimes I post stupidly specific shit. Especially if I'm slightly drunk. Then by the time I think to delete it I can't. Which is a feature I don't love about this place tbh.

 

[eggsausagerice]

As much as I try to hold back sometimes I post stupidly specific shit. Especially if I'm slightly drunk. Then by the time I think to delete it I can't. Which is a feature I don't love about this place tbh.

agree. i basically have to take down the whole post or leave it up. the specific stuff just makes me feel really embarrassed most of the time.

 

[TheHolySword]

Nah, I keep it as vague as possible. I'll mention things about my life but nothing really personal. My username is the most personal thing about me here, but it's been so long since people have known me by this identity, I'd be surprised if I were recognized

 

[ABadPerson]

At first I tried to keep it vague but in a lot of post I had been spiralling so hard that I genuinely feel as though anyone who knew me would be able to tell instantly. But, at the same time I'm weirdly not worried, just don't exactly care?

Its the same for my face, I feel no genuine worry just showing it. I still try not to expose anything but when I do, I just don't care afterwards; this place gets so comforting I struggle to hold irl in much regards.

 

[KenDuh]

I don't really care about anonymity but it kind of it's personal, I wouldn't say here something that I wouldn't say in real life, but I think this is the place for it, some people don't want me blabbering in their dm's just because I feel horrible, so I just write it here instead

 

[snow_in_summer]

I sort of just live in fear of stuff I say here coming back to me somehow so I sort of hold myself back, I guess. But I still appreciate that people here understand the mindset.

 

[FoxSauce]

Hmm I used to be in here as long as I can at the beginning but now I visit sometimes.

For advice or venting or even for discussions.

I mostly am here when im really sad

 

[Dark Moon]

Yeah, I feel like I've overshared about myself too much on here at times but my family doesn't know about this site and they're the only people that I still talk to, so I'm somewhat worried but at the same time not so much.

 

[orpheus_]

I probably share too much but I don't care. Nobody cares anyway, I'm just another meaningless speck of dust

 

[itsnotokayy!22]

something i realized earlier today is that my post is just a thinly veiled blog because i don't anonymize enough details about my life, lol. i feel like i should go through a bigger effort to make my account look like a burner. only have 3 irl friends and my sister would never go here, so i doubt anyone will see my account unless i forget to wipe my laptop data. only my best friend would know me from my posts, since he knows my tone of voice so well. i'm also really verbose in texts, the same way i am here. i'm not really worried about anyone else stumbling across my account.

i kind of talk about everything i have going on, but i try to avoid talking about actual life stuff because then you guys might figure out who i am. i don't have any social media accounts and i'm kind of repulsed by the idea of my face being on the internet at all. i feel a little bad that all my sasu posts will inevitably be forgotten about by the people that read them because they'll leave the site or read posts from new accounts when i go inactive. but i guess that's the nature of the site. i've been thinking about distancing myself from sasu but it's still my second home, since i don't have many friends. i'll really miss the feeling of community on here once i log in for the last time. sasu feels like my first real attempt at having social media (because i hate reddit...). i'm writing this while eating dinner since sasu's become my nightly and morning routine. it would be better if i found something to replace it with, because i still recognize that it's not healthy to always be on a suicide forum. i've been fixated on suicide for so long that i almost can't remember who i was before it. i came on here to research hanging, because that's what a lot of my older posts were about. now i hate hanging and i feel incrediblly frustrated by the idea that suicide was ever supposed to be "easy" in the first place. it took me ages to even step off my stool for a few seconds because i get so scared. a lot of my attempts were just me staring at the noose and hitting the shinji pose on top of my stool because i felt so full of grief. i have a lot of posts talking about feeling embarrassed about it. i kept thinking that "real" suicidal people would just have the strength to do it, but "real" suicide people don't exist. suicidal people are allowed to be alive and not feel guilty for it.

i feel almost wistful reminiscing about the accounts i talked to back in may and early june. none of those people are around anymore. you almost don't notice when accounts stop being active. i'll try to remember to say goodbye once i really do leave, even if i forget that people regularly read my posts and leave comments on them. i know i matter because i still think of those people, even if we barely exchanged messages. being on here constantly will always lead to more rumination than comfort for me, since talking about my thoughts just prolongs their existence in my mind. i think that i've really thrived by having somewhere i can consistently write my thoughts without judgement, but everyone inevitably outgrows being on here. it can just get too depressing being here every day.

This is a very thoughtful post..I appreciate your emotional sentimentality and wished I was one of those people who conversed with you too back in may and June. I get it your feelings and sentiments I truly do get it.

 

[stardewwindceres]

Unless someone got their hands on my computer, they would never find it. I feel like this is the only place on the internet that I can be completely honest and not have to pretend so I hope no one ever does. As long as I don't post usernames from other places or my full, real name, they won't link back here. No one is looking me up though so I have no need for this paranoia. As usual.

 

[littlecutecorpse]

pretty sure i've already shared too much about my life in just the few days that i've been a member here, but i can't help it really. just got a bad habit of oversharing, and i tend to spill a lot here since i feel more at home in this place than anywhere else. doubt anyone in my life would figure i'm on this site anyways, since it's been merely reduced to family, a friend, and a boyfriend.

 

[astr4]

if you know me irl you could probably guess that this is me

but i don't know many people irl that i still socialize with so…

i might have even described some of my tattoos here idk.

i find it hard to care? idk i don't feel invested in my own life. like :/ damn that sucks u found me ig now what. i'm still suicidal what has changed. nothing.

i would feel bad for people i complained about though. feel bad for my friends that i always question their authenticity and motives. i hope they would see its an insecurity problem not their problem.

 

[TheCavernousDeep.]

something i realized earlier today is that my post is just a thinly veiled blog because i don't anonymize enough details about my life, lol. i feel like i should go through a bigger effort to make my account look like a burner. only have 3 irl friends and my sister would never go here, so i doubt anyone will see my account unless i forget to wipe my laptop data. only my best friend would know me from my posts, since he knows my tone of voice so well. i'm also really verbose in texts, the same way i am here. i'm not really worried about anyone else stumbling across my account.

i kind of talk about everything i have going on, but i try to avoid talking about actual life stuff because then you guys might figure out who i am. i don't have any social media accounts and i'm kind of repulsed by the idea of my face being on the internet at all. i feel a little bad that all my sasu posts will inevitably be forgotten about by the people that read them because they'll leave the site or read posts from new accounts when i go inactive. but i guess that's the nature of the site. i've been thinking about distancing myself from sasu but it's still my second home, since i don't have many friends. i'll really miss the feeling of community on here once i log in for the last time. sasu feels like my first real attempt at having social media (because i hate reddit...). i'm writing this while eating dinner since sasu's become my nightly and morning routine. it would be better if i found something to replace it with, because i still recognize that it's not healthy to always be on a suicide forum. i've been fixated on suicide for so long that i almost can't remember who i was before it. i came on here to research hanging, because that's what a lot of my older posts were about. now i hate hanging and i feel incrediblly frustrated by the idea that suicide was ever supposed to be "easy" in the first place. it took me ages to even step off my stool for a few seconds because i get so scared. a lot of my attempts were just me staring at the noose and hitting the shinji pose on top of my stool because i felt so full of grief. i have a lot of posts talking about feeling embarrassed about it. i kept thinking that "real" suicidal people would just have the strength to do it, but "real" suicide people don't exist. suicidal people are allowed to be alive and not feel guilty for it.

i feel almost wistful reminiscing about the accounts i talked to back in may and early june. none of those people are around anymore. you almost don't notice when accounts stop being active. i'll try to remember to say goodbye once i really do leave, even if i forget that people regularly read my posts and leave comments on them. i know i matter because i still think of those people, even if we barely exchanged messages. being on here constantly will always lead to more rumination than comfort for me, since talking about my thoughts just prolongs their existence in my mind. i think that i've really thrived by having somewhere i can consistently write my thoughts without judgement, but everyone inevitably outgrows being on here. it can just get too depressing being here every day.

YES. Bro I can never run for president now I'm FUCKED. This shit will 100% leak and I'll be cooked to hell and back.

 

[MANGIONESHUSBAND]

Same here, it's kind of turning into a sh!tty Facebook page. Ah well, who cares.

something i realized earlier today is that my post is just a thinly veiled blog because i don't anonymize enough details about my life, lol. i feel like i should go through a bigger effort to make my account look like a burner. only have 3 irl friends and my sister would never go here, so i doubt anyone will see my account unless i forget to wipe my laptop data. only my best friend would know me from my posts, since he knows my tone of voice so well. i'm also really verbose in texts, the same way i am here. i'm not really worried about anyone else stumbling across my account.

i kind of talk about everything i have going on, but i try to avoid talking about actual life stuff because then you guys might figure out who i am. i don't have any social media accounts and i'm kind of repulsed by the idea of my face being on the internet at all. i feel a little bad that all my sasu posts will inevitably be forgotten about by the people that read them because they'll leave the site or read posts from new accounts when i go inactive. but i guess that's the nature of the site. i've been thinking about distancing myself from sasu but it's still my second home, since i don't have many friends. i'll really miss the feeling of community on here once i log in for the last time. sasu feels like my first real attempt at having social media (because i hate reddit...). i'm writing this while eating dinner since sasu's become my nightly and morning routine. it would be better if i found something to replace it with, because i still recognize that it's not healthy to always be on a suicide forum. i've been fixated on suicide for so long that i almost can't remember who i was before it. i came on here to research hanging, because that's what a lot of my older posts were about. now i hate hanging and i feel incrediblly frustrated by the idea that suicide was ever supposed to be "easy" in the first place. it took me ages to even step off my stool for a few seconds because i get so scared. a lot of my attempts were just me staring at the noose and hitting the shinji pose on top of my stool because i felt so full of grief. i have a lot of posts talking about feeling embarrassed about it. i kept thinking that "real" suicidal people would just have the strength to do it, but "real" suicide people don't exist. suicidal people are allowed to be alive and not feel guilty for it.

i feel almost wistful reminiscing about the accounts i talked to back in may and early june. none of those people are around anymore. you almost don't notice when accounts stop being active. i'll try to remember to say goodbye once i really do leave, even if i forget that people regularly read my posts and leave comments on them. i know i matter because i still think of those people, even if we barely exchanged messages. being on here constantly will always lead to more rumination than comfort for me, since talking about my thoughts just prolongs their existence in my mind. i think that i've really thrived by having somewhere i can consistently write my thoughts without judgement, but everyone inevitably outgrows being on here. it can just get too depressing being here every day.

Well to be fair for them to recognize you from SaSu page they'd have to be on this website and or suspect you of being on this website. Which means they'd have to know what this website is and be on here which is sort of a tell in and of itself cuz there's only one popular YouTube vid on this site(that's how I found it LMAO) and more importantly that video literally emphasizes that you shouldn't visit this site. So like if anything it's sort of telling on themselves if they visit this site. Ngl. It would very much be a "I saw her at the Devil's sacrament.What were/are you doing at the devil's sacrament" moment for them

 

[Pale_Rider]

All I can say is not only have I never shared any of this elsewhere. Almost nobody knows it. Not a burner, just an alternate me.

 

[NutOrat]

if you know me irl you could probably guess that this is me

but i don't know many people irl that i still socialize with so…

i might have even described some of my tattoos here idk.

i find it hard to care? idk i don't feel invested in my own life. like :/ damn that sucks u found me ig now what. i'm still suicidal what has changed. nothing.

That's my view of it as well. I've become more and more open about myself and my situation on here, back when I made the account I would've never thought of sharing so much. But really, who fucking cares?

Yes, if you know me in real life, you'd immediately know that this is me, but I don't know many people to begin with, I only really talk with my family. Even if there's a chance of someone linking this profile to my public accounts, exposing it somehow, what is that gonna accomplish? If anything, that could be another slight push for me to just get this over with.

i would feel bad for people i complained about though. feel bad for my friends that i always question their authenticity and motives. i hope they would see its an insecurity problem not their problem.

I am worried about that part too, I would never admit many of the things I said here about my family to their faces. I just hope they never find this account, but then, part of me for some reason wishes that they do. It's like I'm sprinkling breadcrumbs all the time, secretly hoping for someone I know to put the pieces together, and then what? What's the game plan? I don't know, I know it's dumb.

sasu feels like my first real attempt at having social media (because i hate reddit...).

Reddit can choke on its karma and other bs. If I was half as open there as I am here I'd get harassed non stop lol. I would never be so honest on my "clean" accounts, even if that sounds absurd. I'm more active here than anywhere, because this place is real, these people here get it. This is the real me, warts and all.

 

[mittymittens]

something i realized earlier today is that my post is just a thinly veiled blog because i don't anonymize enough details about my life, lol. i feel like i should go through a bigger effort to make my account look like a burner. only have 3 irl friends and my sister would never go here, so i doubt anyone will see my account unless i forget to wipe my laptop data. only my best friend would know me from my posts, since he knows my tone of voice so well. i'm also really verbose in texts, the same way i am here. i'm not really worried about anyone else stumbling across my account.

i kind of talk about everything i have going on, but i try to avoid talking about actual life stuff because then you guys might figure out who i am. i don't have any social media accounts and i'm kind of repulsed by the idea of my face being on the internet at all. i feel a little bad that all my sasu posts will inevitably be forgotten about by the people that read them because they'll leave the site or read posts from new accounts when i go inactive. but i guess that's the nature of the site. i've been thinking about distancing myself from sasu but it's still my second home, since i don't have many friends. i'll really miss the feeling of community on here once i log in for the last time. sasu feels like my first real attempt at having social media (because i hate reddit...). i'm writing this while eating dinner since sasu's become my nightly and morning routine. it would be better if i found something to replace it with, because i still recognize that it's not healthy to always be on a suicide forum. i've been fixated on suicide for so long that i almost can't remember who i was before it. i came on here to research hanging, because that's what a lot of my older posts were about. now i hate hanging and i feel incrediblly frustrated by the idea that suicide was ever supposed to be "easy" in the first place. it took me ages to even step off my stool for a few seconds because i get so scared. a lot of my attempts were just me staring at the noose and hitting the shinji pose on top of my stool because i felt so full of grief. i have a lot of posts talking about feeling embarrassed about it. i kept thinking that "real" suicidal people would just have the strength to do it, but "real" suicide people don't exist. suicidal people are allowed to be alive and not feel guilty for it.

i feel almost wistful reminiscing about the accounts i talked to back in may and early june. none of those people are around anymore. you almost don't notice when accounts stop being active. i'll try to remember to say goodbye once i really do leave, even if i forget that people regularly read my posts and leave comments on them. i know i matter because i still think of those people, even if we barely exchanged messages. being on here constantly will always lead to more rumination than comfort for me, since talking about my thoughts just prolongs their existence in my mind. i think that i've really thrived by having somewhere i can consistently write my thoughts without judgement, but everyone inevitably outgrows being on here. it can just get too depressing being here every day.

yes. i think for me it's cause the site imo is not really as popular as like reddit and everyone who has signed up here has at least one thing in common. posting here feels differently than on reddit or twitter etc. it feels more public at least for me, whilst here feels more private.

edit: sorry if other ppl got notifs, i'm on mobile and didn't realize i replied to two other people

 

[INYGTRMTFMO]

I do deliberately try not to post anything that could dox me -- I've been vague about my age, where I live, what exactly I do for work, ect -- but if someone who knew me REALLY well somehow stumbled on this site and felt compelled to dig around my posts, they may have the suspicion it's me from my writing style and personality.

And to them I say: if my being here is a surprise to you, then I've done better than I think I have at pretending to be okay. :)

 

[whywere]

This is the ONLY "social" site that I am or will ever be on.

I use my real first name, as I want to convey the fact that I do NOT do any B.S. and if someone wants to be darn mean well, so be it, I guess.

I have been in business for almost 50 years, and I can state this with 100% certainty, if someone wants something bad enough, they WILL get it. look at all the businesses who get their files broken in to.

I believe in each and every soul here, as we ARE family and outside folks, oh well, they make their own bed in the long run.

Walter

 

[Pluto]

 

[froggirl9000]

Yep. Buuuuut that's the entire reason I'm here to begin with.

I only really learned one thing that I didn't already know about my preferred method of choice before I got here, so more than anything I've viewed the forum as a space for me to talk about my mental health without having to worry about being hit with toxic positivity. So, of course things get real personal.

That, and I like the community here. The people. Met some good people that I value greatly here. But it is mostly just a place for me to whinge about my life, always has been.

 

[whywere]

Yep. Buuuuut that's the entire reason I'm here to begin with.

I only really learned one thing that I didn't already know about my preferred method of choice before I got here, so more than anything I've viewed the forum as a space for me to talk about my mental health without having to worry about being hit with toxic positivity. So, of course things get real personal.

That, and I like the community here. The people. Met some good people that I value greatly here. But it is mostly just a place for me to whinge about my life, always has been.

You NEVER EVER whine, as we ALL work together towards sun filled days and beautiful landscapes!

I have 24/7 chronic pain and so many mental health issues, HOWEVER, with the love and kindness of folks like YOU, it is all manageable.

Have a wonderful rest of this week and a sunny weekend my good friend.

Walter

 

[cme-dme]

Probably but at this point as long as my posts aren't explicit in detail to the point where my posts can be accurately traced to IRL me I'm fine. If a friend discovers my account here I don't really care anymore.