Is it better to burn out? Or fade away?

[TowerUpright]

No, I'm not talking about the Dylan Thomas poem or Neil Young, etc.

I'm wondering, is it better to CTB with it being on anyone's radar? Or is it better to drop hints? Similarly, should I leave a note? Or just leave nothing??

My opinion is that it's best to fade away: simply CTB without anyone knowing (at least as far as I know) about my plans and follow through. That way, my family can think of any reason they like as to why i CTB'd. I suppose I could right a note saying it isn't their fault (which they wouldnt believe anyway). But I'd rather go in a way that the family can interpret as being what ever they desire (blame Satan, the liberals, etc. ) When, in fact, it's my own desire to CTB as I can't stand being on the earth with them. (I don't agree with them politically, and that's an understatement).

Or do you think that's wrong? Should I drop hints? Write a long note, etc? Please, be honest. I can take it.

 

[Stavrogin]

Dropping 'hints' is a cry for help, which is a natural thing to do in your situation because of the pain. I personally don't like the idea of notes because I think the very act of suicide speaks for itself, but that's just me.

 

[glittergore]

I won't tell you what I think you should do because everyone's situation is different, but I'm personally very open with my family about my suicidal intent. I've had brutally honest conversations with them about it, about how it's a very real possibility and something I struggle with constantly. My mom has thanked me for that before because she has done some emotional labor to prepare for if I actually do it. It'll still be devastating - there's only so much you can prepare for such a thing - but she has acclimated herself a bit to the prospect. I'm glad for that because I think blindsiding them would maximize the impact. I also plan to write a note that goes into detail as to why I want to die so there's no ambiguity. I can see them going crazy over the whys; I've read multiple accounts from those that have lost their loved ones to suicide that detail great agony over not knowing why they did it.

This is just me, though.

 

[Viafactorum]

I won't tell you what I think you should do because everyone's situation is different, but I'm personally very open with my family about my suicidal intent. I've had brutally honest conversations with them about it, about how it's a very real possibility and something I struggle with constantly. My mom has thanked me for that before because she has done some emotional labor to prepare for if I actually do it. It'll still be devastating - there's only so much you can prepare for such a thing - but she has acclimated herself a bit to the prospect. I'm glad for that because I think blindsiding them would maximize the impact. I also plan to write a note that goes into detail as to why I want to die so there's no ambiguity. I can see them going crazy over the whys; I've read multiple accounts from those that have lost their loved ones to suicide that detail great agony over not knowing why they did it.

This is just me, though.

You're lucky your parents don't put you in the psych ward. Most parents aren't so understanding...