Introduction

[blah2323]

Greetings, all. So sorry to be meeting you under the circumstances that have driven us here.

By most accounts, I don't have it too bad in life. 30(m) in good physical health, with a decent job and a roof over my head. But for some reason, I can't stand my life. I drink and drug to escape the monotony of everyday life but it only soothes so much of the pain caused by depression and anxiety.

I'm so tired, and find myself closer to suicide than I've been in a decade.

Thanks all, for listening to me vent.

 

[Living_Hurts_so_Much]

Greetings, all. So sorry to be meeting you under the circumstances that have driven us here.

By most accounts, I don't have it too bad in life. 30(m) in good physical health, with a decent job and a roof over my head. But for some reason, I can't stand my life. I drink and drug to escape the monotony of everyday life but it only soothes so much of the pain caused by depression and anxiety.

I'm so tired, and find myself closer to suicide than I've been in a decade.

Thanks all, for listening to me vent.

You have found a good community here. Such open communication about something I could never talk to anyone about.

 

[falloutcarter13]

Being in a place where you can be honest with a community of people who understand and respect your thoughts and feelings...this is an invaluable tool no matter which way you go. I'm sure talking about it openly and honestly convinces many people that they don't really want to die and gives clarity to their own thoughts and emotions. I'm glad you found it and I hope it serves you well, welcome! (Feels so weird to say that, I've only been a member for a day lol. But the people here are so welcoming and supportive that it does feel like home already.)

 

[BetterInthanOut]

Greetings, all. So sorry to be meeting you under the circumstances that have driven us here.

By most accounts, I don't have it too bad in life. 30(m) in good physical health, with a decent job and a roof over my head. But for some reason, I can't stand my life. I drink and drug to escape the monotony of everyday life but it only soothes so much of the pain caused by depression and anxiety.

I'm so tired, and find myself closer to suicide than I've been in a decade.

Thanks all, for listening to me vent.

Hi! It's nice to meet you. The community here is very understanding and non-judgemental. Vent all you need, share your story- don't feel like you don't have enough reason for wanting to ctb, everyone has their own shit going on. Take care, we're here to listen

 

[Nymph]

Welcome

 

[blah2323]

Thanks, everybody, for the warm welcome.

I feel as though I ruined my life when I left high school. I enrolled in a top university, promptly failed to live up to my academic potential, and had to drop out because of my mental health.

I've since gone into significant debt, which I feel I'll never be able to pay off. I've lost good friends because of my alcoholism and avoidant personality. I feel incompetent in social situations, and lack basic self esteem. Life's just not all it's cracked up to be.

 

[Linda]

Thanks, everybody, for the warm welcome.

I feel as though I ruined my life when I left high school. I enrolled in a top university, promptly failed to live up to my academic potential, and had to drop out because of my mental health.

I've since gone into significant debt, which I feel I'll never be able to pay off. I've lost good friends because of my alcoholism and avoidant personality. I feel incompetent in social situations, and lack basic self esteem. Life's just not all it's cracked up to be.

If you had enough talent to get into "a top university" you probably have enough talent to get your life back on track. The first thing I would do if I were in your situation is cut out the alcohol. (That is surprisingly easy when you put your mind to it, however much hold alcohol has on you now. A decade ago I discovered that I would have to avoid all alcohol because of a medical condition. I used to like a drink, or several, but after a couple of weeks without any I found that I didn't miss the stuff. You just have to get through those first few weeks.) Alcohol never helps. Then perhaps you could work out a long term plan, and start implementing it. You can't change your personality, and you would have to work within the constraints that it imposes, but I doubt that those constraints need be an insuperable obstacle. I'm sure you have the intelligence to plan how to deal better with social situations (even though you will probably never feel really comfortable in them). It's tough getting back up again when you are down, but I think you're in with a chance here. Perhaps you should give it another try before you conclude that you have had enough of life. Good luck.