Introduction, sort of

[selenite]

I'm 19, been wanting to CTB since 11. Tried a lot of times but no cigar. I still don't know what to do sometimes. I have a wonderful partner and a life that should make me happy. I've tried medication and all that. All my mental illnesses make every day hell. I just wish I could be happy or die safely (but, supply issues as you all know, plus I'm a coward). I want to live yet i want to die, it's very very strange. I guess i just want to be happy but sometimes the suffering doesn't seem worth it

 

[Uk2023]

I'm 19, been wanting to CTB since 11. Tried a lot of times but no cigar. I still don't know what to do sometimes. I have a wonderful partner and a life that should make me happy. I've tried medication and all that. All my mental illnesses make every day hell. I just wish I could be happy or die safely (but, supply issues as you all know, plus I'm a coward). I want to live yet i want to die, it's very very strange. I guess i just want to be happy but sometimes the suffering doesn't seem worth it

I like to think your leaving childhood/teenage years behind and have your 20's round the corner.

Could be a great decade ahead for you

Maybe you don't have the alignment yet - or that motto/belief/ideal to guide it.

A morning and before bed routine could help where you chat with yourself, a pep talk, gratitude talk, even just a wish to have a good day and restful sleep.

The suffering and awareness off it; those feelings could actually be a warning to steer yourself AWAY from it.

I don't know what provokes it BUT if you start feeling that way maybe it's intuition saying you have to seek calmer waters and stay grounded/relaxed/positive and it will pass

 

[voc_89]

20s is about struggling to make a name for yourself. 30s is about reaping the rewards from that effort. 40s is about profiting from the links created by the name u established in your 20s and 30s. 50s is about trying to maximise your employment years and plan an early retirement strategy. Thats my thoughts on the age groups. Hopefully for most it plays out like that. That is what kind of kept my sanity during the rough teen and 20s period. That when I get 30 its gonna change. It didn't happen overnight mind you but things really did do a 180 for me in my 30s.