Introduce yourself

[alice-as-cassandra]

hi, i'm a neurodivergent elder millennial with a history of trauma. diagnosed with borderline personality disorder in 2007, self diagnosed autistic in the last few years.

pronouns are she/her/they

i've had suicidal ideations for nearly my entire life. but in the last 10 years it has evolved to a pro-choice stance.

some issues in my life have become unbearable recently. my spouse of 13 years has come out as transgender. i've always been supportive of the queer community, but have never been impacted directly like this. i'm afraid of the changes to come, i'm afraid of losing the love of my life, the only person who ever made life livable. and i want to exit before my heart is broken any more.

 

[quietpill]

I suppose I should make one of these after responding to a few posts. My name is Warren, I've suffered depression and suicidal tendencies/ideation since at least the age of 9. Hope hurts too much to have at this point, especially as a burnout with little prospect in life aside from surviving. My (very real) social awkwardness is probably the least of my problems, but we move.

I love cinema, TV shows, animation. I tend to curate these interests heavily, but not so pompous as that might come off. I am picky about everything from comedy/satire to psych thrillers and anime. My favorite genre is horror. My favorite show is Sunny in Philadelphia and I have 2500 hours (begrudgingly) on Overwatch. I enjoy video games, but I enjoy interactive fiction games more. Aside from these, I simply enjoy my cat.

 

[avalokitesvara]

I've had a problem with my sense of self since I was a child. I'm now 33 and facing a crossroads. I have the opportunity to become a Zen buddhist monk, which is the only viable life for me, the only thing that has meaning and makes sense for someone like me with my experience of selfhood and the world. It's taken me a very long time to find this path and I believe in it wholeheartedly, it has been a huge relief to finally find something it is possible for me to do with this life. However, this opportunity is contingent on external bureaucratic factors (I require a visa to live in the country where my monastery is located), and the odds are not very strong that I will receive a favourable outcome. At the moment I am waiting to find out.

Because of my selfhood issues I also have diagnosed depression and have had suicidal thoughts since a young age. If I cannot overcome the bureaucratic obstacles to the life that I could have lived as a monk, I will choose to die instead. It is not possible for me to continue existing as a regular normal person, because I derive no pleasure or meaning from the things that other people seem to. I cannot live a life pretending to be a person. I have had plenty of ordinary experiences, love, sex, friends, family, jobs, travel etc. but they ultimately don't amount to anything. I don't feel them. I am permanently oriented towards emptiness. Living as a monk is living with this orientation towards emptiness as the point of life, it means being able to stop having to pretend to care about things that are meaningless to you.

I am here to discuss suicide because it really is my only topic of interest at this time. I can also talk about zen buddhism with anyone who is curious. (I am just one person, I am not a buddhist teacher, nothing I say should be taken as buddhist teaching because it isn't, it's one person's interpretation). In terms of suicide I am particularly interested in the final moments themselves, the ways people prepare for them, and the philosophical/psychological states of being with which people approach death voluntarily.

I'm quite into music, books, and art. At the moment I'm listening a lot to Bladee. Writers I like include W G Sebald, Jean Améry, Spinoza, Roland Barthes, Cioran. My avatar is a photo from a performance by the Viennese Actionist artist Rudolf Schwarzkogler.

 

[shouldbedirt]

Hello, I've been working up the courage to post anything on this site for a while now... I lurk a lot.

I guess I'll go by Angel. they/them though I don't particularly mind being called "he" at times. I'm in my early 20s, and I guess you could call me a NEET.

Severe unmedicated anxiety. I have a very intense fear of medicines, among many other things. Somewhat agoraphobic. I have depression and C-PTSD as well. I have a generally weak and unhealthy body, much due to my mental issues. Neurodivergent for sure, possibly autistic.

I love surrealism, horror, art, and cats. Sorry to keep it so barebones but I'm a pretty paranoid guy so it's hard to reveal much about myself, but this is probably just fine for a simple introduction anyway...


I do have one question though, can anyone tell me why I can't view other users profiles? Is it because I'm still a new member? or because I haven't posted before?

 

[avalokitesvara]

Hello, I've been working up the courage to post anything on this site for a while now... I lurk a lot.

I guess I'll go by Angel. they/them though I don't particularly mind being called "he" at times. I'm in my early 20s, and I guess you could call me a NEET.

Severe unmedicated anxiety. I have a very intense fear of medicines, among many other things. Somewhat agoraphobic. I have depression and C-PTSD as well. I have a generally weak and unhealthy body, much due to my mental issues. Neurodivergent for sure, possibly autistic.

I love surrealism, horror, art, and cats. Sorry to keep it so barebones but I'm a pretty paranoid guy so it's hard to reveal much about myself, but this is probably just fine for a simple introduction anyway...


I do have one question though, can anyone tell me why I can't view other users profiles? Is it because I'm still a new member? or because I haven't posted before?

I think the permissions of what you can see and do on this site are restricted depending on age of account and how much you post… I only joined yesterday but started posting and interacting a lot very quickly so started being able to see profiles and messaging quite fast.
Love your signature btw, so cute

 

[blak73]

I am 51 and have a life that has been so screwed up by trauma that a psychiatrist recently wrote to my GP snd said I have some sort of psychotic illness where I fantasise that bad things have happened to me, because no one could be that unlucky, my stories are implausible. Even my doctor sadly knew he was wrong. It is my life. Believe me I have had a good shot at changing things, trying to do what will supposedly heal me. But my life is just hell. Sadly I am also one of those super intelligent people so what seems functional for the rest of the world is not functional for me. Not even close. I have ADHD and I am autistic so I never fit in, I never find anyone who can understand or even begin to treat me. I am Aboriginal and was stolen as a kid and so never fit in with black or white people. I have just mastered the art my whole life of delivering the human people want to see, because when I am me I am not what the world wants. I have tried to CTB before but this time I have really been doing my research. I just need to be sure it is fool proof. The only time I feel calm or happy is when another piece of my plan arrives or is put in place. It is such a relief to be able to write this knowing that there will be no consequences. It is hard when you are consumed by thinking about something, but cannot talk about it, or get ideas.

 

[shouldbedirt]

I think the permissions of what you can see and do on this site are restricted depending on age of account and how much you post… I only joined yesterday but started posting and interacting a lot very quickly so started being able to see profiles and messaging quite fast.
Love your signature btw, so cute

I see. Thank you very much!

 

[Su Xin]

你好！我 20 岁了，虽然我的身体可能感觉有点老了，但我仍然喜欢像个无忧无虑的孩子一样，不会想太多。当然，当涉及到某些人或情况时，我知道我需要用我的大脑。


我对不寻常的事物很感兴趣。例如，最近我开始追求班上的一个女孩。她让我想起了中学时的自己，那时我独自从一个城市搬到另一个城市。我想她会理解那种感觉——我一直都是孤独的。


但我们不要过多地纠结于此。目前，我还没有 CTB（结束一切）的计划，尽管我过去确实有过这种想法——但不是很强烈（部分原因是我没有成功追求那个女孩）。然而，最初的问题并不完全是我的错。她说她"讨厌男人"（是的，没错），但我不想再深入挖掘她真正的原因了——现在这些都不重要了。哦，顺便说一句，她确实第二次联系我，问她最好的朋友我是否还喜欢她。


我喜欢吃糖果，尤其是打字的时候——我现在正在嚼一些糖果。我喜欢看动漫和电影，尤其是那些有意义和发人深省的。


顺便说一句，我注意到这个平台上的很多人都受过高等教育，知识渊博。我希望在这里学到一两件事！最近我对很多事情都感兴趣，哈哈。


很高兴认识你们！<3

 

[Su Xin]

你好！我20岁了，虽然我的身体可能感觉有点老了，但我仍然喜欢像无忧无虑的孩子一样，不会想太多。当然，当涉及到某些人或某些情况时，我知道我需要用我的大脑。


我对不同的事情很感兴趣。例如，最近我开始追求班上的一个女孩。她让我想起了自己小时候的事，然后我独自从一个城市搬到另一个城市。我想她能理解那种人——感觉我一直都是孤独的。


但我们不会太麻烦。目前，我还没有CTB（结束一切）的计划，虽然我过去确实有过这样的想法——但不是很强烈（部分原因是我成功追求那个女孩）。然而，最初的问题并不是我的错。她说她"讨厌男人"（是的，没错），完全但我不想再深入挖掘她真正的原因了——现在这些都不重要了。哦，顺便说一句，她确实第二次我，问她最好的朋友我是否还喜欢她。


我喜欢吃糖果，尤其是打字的时候——我现在正在咀嚼一些糖果。我喜欢看动漫和电影，尤其是那些有意义且能让人深省的。


顺便说一句，我注意到这个平台上的很多人都受过高等教育，知识渊博。我希望在这里学到一两件事！最近我对很多事情都感兴趣，哈哈。


很高兴认识你们！<3

顺便问一下，如何获得某些权限，例如查看别人的帖子、访问聊天室或使用搜索功能？

 

[Hysteria]

Hello, I feel like I can't kill myself. I want to, but don't know how to do it. I couldn't write a successful plan in my 28 years of life living as a trans. I don't know how to explain it. I'm not only a female in a male body, but I've got a female person inside me with various other entities. Most of them are much better than me, but we share the fate of being trapped inside the same flesh-and-blood prison.

I epically failed with Night Night, which resulted in a few months in the psych ward and five months of rehab, but nothing became better except getting finally a diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia and heavy depression. I feel like my treatment is highly ineffective, but my doctors don't listen to me. - I feel so tired and don't have life energy.

Sometimes writing technical analytics on cryptocurrencies makes me feel better, but I often feel no one is interested in what I'm doing. Starting a trading diary here on the forum will be a final and desperate attempt for me to contribute.

I don't genuinely believe that anyone would be interested in my work. If sleep could kill, I would only stay in my bed forever. I just want to sit down and die. Why do I have to suffer like this?

 

[whitetaildeer]

hiya. i've lurked here for a while, both with and without an account. i was diagnosed as autistic when i was little, and my current stresses are ptsd and depression. also in forced recovery for bulimia. pronouns are he/him; i'd really like to make some other trans friends and/or neurodivergent here. gratuitously afraid of people. i've been (purposely) isolating myself even before covid, so this is my first attempt at breaking out of my shell in years

i have a hellacious transformers brain worm, but i also like reading and writing (in spite of my terrible english skills). i'm also interested in getting back into drawing, and i'd like to get into history, investing, or simply learning more about animals.

i sometimes play video games, just not very often. i really just prefer to chat.

very interested in ctb, very afraid to actually attempt. i've been suicidal since i was 8; most of my suicidal tendencies are driven by perfectionism, insecurity, and ptsd.

i'm here mostly for the problems above, but also because my life feels out of control. i feel like a spectator to my own mediocre life, and detaching myself to that extent has both helped me, and made me feel excruciatingly helpless. i'd like to make something out of my life before i go out, even if it's as simple as getting the courage to share my writing online, or making some friends here.

 

[Fall Leaf]

Hello. I'm in my early 20s. I'm transmasc and non-binary. My pronouns are they/them but he is okay too honestly.
I heard about this forum from online discussions about it so I was curious to check it out. I visited this place over a year but only lately I made my own account. I thought it can nice to have people who are similar to me to talk to. I'm use to isolating myself irl.

I'm dealing with suicidal thoughts from a very early age. I tried to CTB a couple times. I'm not sure if I want to try again. If so, I'll have to be more professional about it.
I feel very hopeless and stuck in life. I can't get myself to a better place right now but I'm not 100% I want to CBT.
My severe symptoms of OCD and depended attachment type are taking over my life. I also have social problems and I suffer from PTSD (and maybe C-PTSD, but I'm not diagnosed) and I have mood changes. Currently my depression and anxiety levels are at the higher side.

When I'm in a better state, I'm a very artistic person. I love making lot of kinds of art but I have a special place for film making. I also like cooking and playing video games, even though I'm terrible at most of them.
I'll be glad to meet new friends, it seems like the option for me to PM users is still locked though, I guess it's because I'm a new user. When it won't be locked, I'll be happy to chat with new people. Take in my mind my English isn't great, since it's my second language.

 

[foreverlanguish]

Hello-ha! I'm from the US and I go by she/they pronouns. I've been lurking here ever since I was 15-16, and now that I just turned 18. can finally contribute! I'm a gamer, it's kind of my vent, and I love to write, eat hot fries, watch anime/cartoons, and sing, among other things! While I've attempted in years past, I had two recent failed attempts these past couple months and experienced the hells of being in a psychiatric institution not one, but two times (my stays weren't that bad, but they still were troubling nonetheless). Because I've failed the last two times, I'm desperate to find a way out ASAP and welcome any doable methods. I've been diagnosed with ADHD, Autism, Depression, and mild Anxiety.
My hopes while here are to find ways to combat SI and find a CTB partner, if possible

 

[victorisunlucky]

Hi hello, I'm 19 and from the US. I've been lurking here since sanctionedsuicide got mentioned on MATI. I have autism, generalized anxiety disorder, and major depressive disorder. I study electrical engineering at a state school, and I like playing vidya and listening to vocaloid.

I flipflop between actively wanting to off myself and actively wanting to get better several times a week. It's very confusing and I struggle really knowing what I want. Either way, I feel like I belong on this forum in particular.

 

[TheMountainTreeEgg]

Hello, I'm a freshman in college and I've know about this website for a year or so, I found myself checking it out for a while and eventually went to join. I love playing video games and I'm a huge manga enthusiast, I draw a bit and like to I'm also love to skateboard but I'm very shitty at it. I've been dealing with self hatred for a while now and tend to have suicidal thoughts when I get in a depressive state.

it would be cool if I was a tree instead of a human.

 

[moonlight gate]

i'm 51 from Eastern Canada. veteran of the Bosnian wars 93-95 where i did 2 tour of duty. Gaming enthusiast. been gaming since 1980. music and movies enthusiast. car guy. love driving. i drive on average 5000 kilometers a month. my vehicle is the only place i feel safe. i sleep in my vehicle often. even if it is minus 36 Celcius outside. i also play drums as an amateur but with fairly high technical skills. love traveling. been to a lot of places. 36 countries. my favorite subject is Astro physics. i have a collection of very high quality giant binoculars that i use to stargaze. i have done a lot of things in my life including building a bridge in BC, Canada. i feel like i have lived the life of 4 human beings of 80 years old already at my age. i have done more things and seen more things than most humans if they had a thousand lifetimes. that is one of the main reason why i often find it difficult to keep going on. my family are pretty much all aware of my intentions. in fact i am currently in process with Dignitas. but i feel i can do it just as good on my own if not better. the only thing i like about Dignitas is that the people i love can be there.

 

[qwertyuiopasdfghjkl]

Hello
Not sure where to start. As you can see, I have no creativity in making a username lol. Found this forum after doing some research into good methods and realizing successfully CTBing is much harder than I thought. My life's been a mess, entirely self-inflicted. Having no executive function whatsoever frankly devoids my life of meaning and free will. I have no memory of ever being successful or deserving of the air I breathe daily. Recently got some treatment, am giving antidepressants and stimulants one last try before I decide my fate.

 

[-less-]

Hey! You can call me Less.

I came across this forum a few months ago and I was so glad to see that a space like this exists.

I've been feeling suicidal on and off for years and it's not something I've ever been able to fully open up to anyone about. I feel the need to downplay it significantly when talking to therapists and doctors because I'm terrified of having my autonomy taken away in some way, and I don't want to worry the people close to me or make them feel powerless to help me. So I've just been keeping it inside so far, but the feelings have been getting worse and worse as time goes on. I feel like I really need someplace like this where I can be honest about how I'm feeling while I work through all this, where I don't have to worry about having someone else's conclusions shoved down my throat or distressing the people I love if I voice the pain and hopelessness I've been feeling.

I love making art of all kinds, though I'm not very good at it. I also love science and philosophy. I struggle to maintain the energy I need to keep my friendships from deteriorating, but I care very deeply about the people who are in my life and I try hard to bring some good to the lives of others when I can. If I ever do recover from my trauma and depression, my hope is to become the kind of person who sucks the marrow out of life. But right now I've mostly just been trying to get through the days with easy comforts while I daydream about a better life.

 

[dOm!n!K]

Never introduced myself here so I might since I decided to not just lurk. I'm fine with being called domi or vik (neither being my names) I'm a graphic designer and I'm going to med school if money issues in my family allow me to (and my mental health as well). I'm polish (sadly) but I love travelling abroad. I'm interested in literature, painting, sewing, cosplay and a lot of different shows (cartoons, anime, live action, everything basically). I listen to all kinds of music but I'm diehard McCafferty fan! And I plan to learn how to play piano. I'm autistic, possibly have dissociative issues but I'm just trying to go through my life and survive somehow. Also I'm catholic!

 

[let.me.let.go87]

So my brain and uterus were simultaneously ruined at the ripe age of 12 and I have PTSD MDD and BPD. I was often abused at home as well so that was just the straw that broke my back I guess. I tried to kill myself for the first time the night after that. And I have been trying to kill myself for pretty much the rest of my life ever since I have failed over 30 attempts in 25 years and I came here to try to find the right way to do it because apparently it's the one thing I can't get right at all

 

[death_bed221]

Hi I am a 30 year guy that made one mistake that ruined his life. I didn't harm anyone but that mistake made me lose my friends and my mind. I will suicide soon. Where I live, no one even says hi to me nor anything. I cant find a job cuz everyone soon finds about my mistake and bullies me. Its a small town and everyone knows everything. In my last days all I am looking for is some people to talk to. I don't think I deserve to be treated this way but it is what it is.

 

[kenma0]

hello there. you can call me Friday. just joined. im 26, female, born in the midwest USA. i have a lot of interests but havent really been into them much lately due to depression. i like minecraft and horror movies, goth music and the goth scene. i live with my best friend which is great, but cannot share my struggles with them really... hoping to find some solace here.

my wanting to cbt rlly stems from my relationship problems. my ex partner cheated on me in 2023, came back early 2024, used me for his own gain through the whole year, only to go back to the one he cheated on me with very recently, and now acts so cold towards me. hes the only person ive ever cared abour, dreamt of being with. most people tell me to forget him and focus on myself but i have one problem.

i hate myself. ive hated myself since i was young. i dont feel i deserve to be happy, i dont feel i deserve good things, and that i did something wrong, to deserve my ex partner leaving me, using me, and speaking to me the way he does. i dont have a well paying job, i dont do well in school, and i fear the world is becoming a worse place to live. i want a family one day, but the person i wanted it with doesnt want me, and it is all my fault. i truly cannot picture a future that doesnt involve my death. i think about how others would feel about my death, but i know if i did die, i wouldnt have to worry about their reactions, their disappointment in me, or their problems. all my mental turmoil would be gone. i constantly think about my ex, it eats away at me, destroys me. i think about what i shouldve done different, and regret it every day.

i dont know if anyone here has problems like these. regrets about a partner, missing someone, being betrayed. but maybe someone here could help me. or find solace alongside me. thank you for taking the time to read this.

 

[princessame]

Hello, on this site i'd just like to be called "ame" for anonymity. I'm currently 19, so my life hasn't really started too much, only really beginning my adulthood, and yet I still feel really painfully hopeless anyway (not to be an edgelord or anything) i want to get on this site so I can vent openly and not feel guilty about it

outside of that, I really like things like videogames and animanga and drawing.. I would like to post my art here, but I feel like that it'd expose me, so I'd like to keep it hidden from this site until then. Maybe if I make some closer friends I wouldn't mind

 

[onlyusefulwhenused]

Hello, I am Skittles from the US. I am 27

I found this site the other night when I was in the darkest void I had been in for awhile…and I still feel in that void, the longer I stare into it…I want to go in and never look back.

I have suffered from mental and emotional abuse since I was 5yrs old by my own father… I also suffered emotional incest from him as well. Which I feel dirty about…I had always thought our 'relationship' was normal till my early 20s.

He still abuses me to this day…and I just feel like I can't let go.

But I have suffered many other forms of abuse and bullying from others. Ex boyfriends, ex friends, and people I have never even met before.

I chose my username from how many times I have been used by an friend…and that is what led me to this dark place. I can never stop the cycle of my bpd self destruction. I just want so much love to be felt…but in the end, they never love me.

Next to my step father dying…it all hits me at once.

I always wanted to be someone, I mourn my childhood, teenage years, and my 20s. I never felt I had a chance in this world.

I enjoy many things such as art, reading and drawing. But nothing feels worth breathing for. I want to go so bad…to be with someone I lost to cbt.

I graduated college for mortuary this year, passed exams and well…no jobs. Which strains my family more…only my husband works. We are in debt. I have two children who I must live for…though I'd feel like they'd be better off without someone so 'miserable' such as myself.

miserable is what I'm called. I see myself as a crazy, miserable, selfish, and disgusting woman. I need to vent. Vent to a place where I am safe. Where no one can use my trauma against me. A place to vent so I can stop venting so much to friends.

I am a weak woman…I feel like a scared child. I don't know where life is taking me. I really don't. I've attempted 2x this year. i got too scared and talked out of by a friend.

Death draws near…but not sure when.

But for now, I'm still looking into the void…held back by my own self…

 

[kitia973]

搜索好像要有10+的post才能显现

顺便问一下，如何获得某些权限，例如查看别人的帖子、访问聊天室或使用搜索功能？

我叫kitia，是个女生。中文+英文都可以，是来自中国的美国留学生。
MBTI是INTJ-A

喜欢聊一些哲学问题，包括虚无主义和一些社会现象等等。本人也是理科生，对物理非常感兴趣。
我的聊天风格可能有点过于正式，但是跟我聊熟了我其实挺热情的。我对话题没有什么太大的忌讳

对了，我也喜欢玩galgame，特别是钟表社的一些神作。很喜欢友爱俱乐部。


I go by Kitia, and I use she/her pronouns. I am an exchange student from China in the US.

I like discussing philosphy and nihilism, as well as some societal phenomena. I also study mathematics and science, and I am especially interested in physics.
My typing style can seem a bit too formal, but I am actually quite friendly once people get closer to me.

I like playing galgames (Japanese visual novels). I enjoy works by Clockup, such as Fraternite.

 

[Su Xin]

搜索需要 10+ 的帖子才能出现

我叫kitia，是个女生。中文+英文都可以，是来自中国的美国留学生。
MBTI是INTJ-A

喜欢聊一些哲学问题，包括虚无主义和一些社会现象等等。本人也是理科生，对物理非常感兴趣。
我的聊天风格可能有点过于正式，但我聊天熟了，我其实很热情的。我对话题没有什么严肃的忌讳

对了，我也喜欢玩galgame，特别是钟表社的一些神作。很喜欢友爱俱乐部。


我叫 Kitia，我用的是她/她的代词。我是一名来自中国的美国交换生。

我喜欢讨论哲学和虚无主义，也喜欢讨论一些社会现象。我也学习数学和科学，尤其对物理感兴趣。
我的打字风格可能看起来有点过于正式，但一旦人们靠近我，我实际上会非常友好。

我喜欢玩 galgames（日本视觉小说）。我喜欢 Clockup 的作品，例如 Fraternite。

我记得上次测试我的性格是INFP什么的，对某些哲学也感兴趣的，不过我对虚无主义这些什么的本质只是知道而且，并不是很清楚。
我最近对阿德勒心理学很感兴趣，对于你说的正式的什么，我感觉还不错啦

galgame我之前也玩过，死馆，沙耶之歌这些我也过，之前本来打算玩玩的，刷额，结果是后面对galgame没多大兴趣了感觉玩不下去，没有耐心，不过在这个我找是视频（不会外语(ó﹏ò｡))
我刚搜了下，额（有点刻板印象了啊）对于玩这种类型的女生还是蛮奇怪的，可能我对女生不是很了解吧
对了我草莓之前有个中国产的galgame《饿殍：明末千里行》蛮火的，感兴趣的可以去搜搜

如果可能还是蛮想和你玩的，因为对我来说交一个在国外那么远的朋友是一件很酷的事，哈哈(๑ᵔ⤙ᵔ๑)

 

[kitia973]

我记得上次测试我的性格是INFP什么的，对某些哲学也感兴趣的，不过我对虚无主义这些什么的本质只是知道而且，并不是很清楚。
我最近对阿德勒心理学很感兴趣，对于你说的正式的什么，我感觉还不错啦

galgame我之前也玩过，死馆，沙耶之歌这些我也过，之前本来打算玩玩的，刷额，结果是后面对galgame没多大兴趣了感觉玩不下去，没有耐心，不过在这个我找是视频（不会外语(ó﹏ò｡))
我刚搜了下，额（有点刻板印象了啊）对于玩这种类型的女生还是蛮奇怪的，可能我对女生不是很了解吧
对了我草莓之前有个中国产的galgame《饿殍：明末千里行》蛮火的，感兴趣的可以去搜搜

如果可能还是蛮想和你玩的，因为对我来说交一个在国外那么远的朋友是一件很酷的事，哈哈(๑ᵔ⤙ᵔ๑)

哈哈哈没事，我玩的那些钟表社gal大部分都是图个猎奇而已。
不过谢谢啦，国产的那个gal我会去搜的。

 

[peacefulafterlife]

hi everybody, i'm in my 20's, german. i've wanted to commit suicide an uncountable number of times over my lifetime, having been depressed since childhood. i've been reading this forum for a very long time, almost since it started in fact. it feels like this is the only place on the internet where you can freely express wanting to die without people freaking out over it.

 

[Su Xin]

哈哈哈没事，我玩的那些钟表社gal大部分都是图个猎奇而已。
不过谢谢啦，国产的那个gal我会去搜的。

嘿嘿，太好啦，出现搜索和聊天还有可以直接看别人的帖子啦(๑ᵔ⤙ᵔ๑)

 

[livershapedbox]

Hi, I'm 19 and live in spain. I was born with a disease that disfigured my body and face, I was put on meds that stop the disfigurement at 18 but it was already too late. In theory the meds could reverse certain effects of the disease overtime, but not really enough to make much of a difference, I haven't noticed anything other than slightly better skin so far. I'm quite dysfunctional at the moment but have decided to try every option left to fix the damage (which will require money, so I have to become functional enough to save it up). If once I have done everything possible to improve I'm still too disfigured, I will CTB knowing I did all that I could to try to win