I'm so tired but can't CTB yet

[Birdie]

I really don't have strong ties with anything in this world that only gets worse and is definitively pointless. I wish I was never born at all, and I hope to be able to CTB peacefully in my terms, like a Sleeping Beauty. I'm thinking a lot about it these days and the only things that is keeping me alive is the concern with my mother. I don't want her to cry for me, and I know her, she would blame herself for the rest of her life and thinking about it kills me inside... so I'll be by her side until the end of her days, and then, I'll go as well. Thinking about it scares me because I can't imagine a world without her, but then, if there's something after death, we'll meet again right after and that's comforting. I'll just deal with all this pain by now, knowing that I'll definitively be free someday...

 

[WornOutLife]

I think you're an amazing person due to taking your mother's feelings into account.
The very same thing happens with my dad. I can't just live him and my dog alone.

That's why I've decided to fight life and try to live for some more time.

We will all be free someday. That makes me kinda happy at least lol.

Hugs and love,

Matt

 

[Birdie]

I think you're an amazing person due to taking your mother's feelings into account.
The very same thing happens with my dad. I can't just live him and my dog alone.

That's why I've decided to fight life and try to live for some more time.

We will all be free someday. That makes me kinda happy at least lol.

Hugs and love,

Matt

Thank you so much. Hugging you right back.
I'm in so much pain, but I can trust that we will be free, hold on to that.