liverviper
Member
- Jul 16, 2026
- 5
I don't know if this is a common thing at all, but sometimes when I'm scrolling twitter or instagram and I see someone with art I really like that's really popular, I start to get really jealous and just want to be them to the point that I'm thinking "if I ctb can I be reborn as them?"
Obviously, the easiest fix is getting offline, but if anything, that just makes me spiral deeper. I start thinking about how ahead I was as a child and how much I've fallen behind everyone. I want to be good at art like I used to be, I want to be good at sewing and cooking like I was years ago, but I get home from work and can only think about laying down and on my days off, I tell myself I'll clean up, but the AC has been broken for almost a year now, and just makes doing anything a pain. I'm in the south, so at the absolute coolest it's maybe 70 degrees. I try to tell myself that my life is just starting, but I've still already wasted so much of it. I can never go back to the childhood. I want to improve, but I'm scared of people looking over my shoulder and judging me.
Obviously, the easiest fix is getting offline, but if anything, that just makes me spiral deeper. I start thinking about how ahead I was as a child and how much I've fallen behind everyone. I want to be good at art like I used to be, I want to be good at sewing and cooking like I was years ago, but I get home from work and can only think about laying down and on my days off, I tell myself I'll clean up, but the AC has been broken for almost a year now, and just makes doing anything a pain. I'm in the south, so at the absolute coolest it's maybe 70 degrees. I try to tell myself that my life is just starting, but I've still already wasted so much of it. I can never go back to the childhood. I want to improve, but I'm scared of people looking over my shoulder and judging me.
