I was reading my last year's GOODBYE THREAD and....LOL

[WornOutLife]

Geez! Reading that thread brings back so many memories. I was really sure I was gonna die!! (I'll leave the link of my old goodbye thread at the end of this post in case you wanna read it)

It's quite astonishing to see how many things have changed in almost one year.

For instance, I had said I was an atheist but now I consider myself an agnostic because I can't prove nor disprove any kind of God's existence! (even though I think there's probably none but still, not 100% sure)

Another example, how could I be so "brave"? I even wrote that I might fail and suffer from permanent brain damage!!!!!!!! WTF!!!?
Curious thing, I never mentioned something very important: the 100 sleeping pills and anti-depressants I took. I mean, hanging was coming after that but it seems I knew there was no way some pills could kill me and thought they were just gonna help me to supress my SI and hang myself ASAP.


Last but not least, I wrote: "Should I fail, you'll hear from me again"

I guess I kept my word lol.

Have you also failed to ctb? Do you have an old goodbye thread? How do you feel about it?

Here's mine:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/im-really-leaving-this-time.44637/

 

[Scribble Fan]

Here is my old goodbye thread. I was soooo certain that was going to be the day. Now I just feel embarrassed and silly lol!

 

[noname223]

I have never tried to ctb. My main goal is achieving the goal if I try to do it. I fear permanent damage as hell. This is why i really like the SN method.
I think I am glad I never failed one.

 

[FuneralCry]

You sounded so certain that you were going to ctb. It shows how hard it is to take our own lives as you are still here despite this. Last year I wanted to ctb and I tried to wrap a cord around my neck thinking it would do it - how stupid. I didn't really know anything then.