Venting I want to live but I'm afraid of my future

[HollowSoul]

Before knowing about this forum, I was so sure I wanted to ctb, and i really thought if I found the right method for me I would be at ease... But no, It made my anxiety skyrocket like never before, I suppose because for once It become too real of a possibility

You know, Im in a really bad place right now, i cant find a job, im 31 and still living with my parents and everyday that It goes I feel like im living like a zombie but on the other hands, my parents are extremely nice to me, they never lose hope and i have like a very wonderful small group of friends who are too on the same page as me (so i dont feel too much like a loser with them) they're always try to help as much as they can...

So deep down I dont want to ctb, but I feel i will never have a proper job and a proper salary to live my own life and i feel like time is running out for me...its very very hard to be optimistic

Idk just wanted to vent a little :(

 

[timf]

Throughout history those who have had power squeezed as much as they could out of those who had no power. Today TV and movies portray people as having everything they could want and those who don';t have big salaries as losers. It makes most of us feel we are losers.

The US had excelled in agriculture and then manufacturing. However, since the 1980s agriculture has been industrialized and manufacturing has been sent out of the country. As a result most of us are left trying to find ways to survive on the fringe of what corporations have done to us.

Rather than seeing yourself as a loser, I would say that having parents and friends who care about you makes you a winner. The TV fantasy with everyone having all the money to do whatever they want if it was real would be a disaster. In a world where friends and family need each other to survive, one finds the connections that make life rewarding.