I want to be with my dead boyfriend again so badly.

[BlueButterfly111]

I have dreams about him almost every night, I think about him 24/7. It's been 6 months since he passed away and I'm still in love with him and want him back. I literally have fake conversations with him in my head, and I make up fake scenarios with him in my head. I think my body has reacted to his death badly because ever since he passed away, I've had all kinds of health issues and bodily pain. I don't care about being with anyone else, there was no one like him, he was so special.

I'm hoping there's some kind of afterlife where I can be with him or at least my soul or spirit can reunite with his. But even if there's no afterlife, eternal sleep is better than living. I just want to join him.

I have to wait until I have enough money next month to purchase Sn and a hotel room. Probably would've done it sooner but I didn't know about Sn until now.

 

[GoSan1]

That used to be my biggest fear back when I still had hope for love. I cant imagine how cruel it is. I pray you get reunited with him ASAP.

 

[BlueButterfly111]

That used to be my biggest fear back when I still had hope for love. I cant imagine how cruel it is. I pray you get reunited with him ASAP.

Thank you so much. It's so cruel because I had such a lonely life before I met him. I always wanted someone to love and to love me back. And then he came into my life and gave me so much love, and I loved him back. Then he passed away, and now I'm lonely again and so heartbroken. I hope I will be reunited with him too!

 

[nomoredolor]

I just want to be reunited with my best friend who I was in love with too. He was so special and he died just under a month ago. The pain and grief is unbearable. I just want to join him in death and be with him. I also hope there is enough of an afterlife for us to be together too. If not I'll settle for dying the same way as him (also SN) and thinking about the other. I'm so sorry this has also happened to you. The pain is too much, we should be euthanized.

Anna

 

[CatLvr]

I am so sorry for your loss. Someone leaving so young and with so much promise ahead is so unfair -- unfair to them, unfair to those who love them, and unfair to the world. May peace be with you and you get to reunite with your beloved soon.

 

[Defenestration]

I have dreams about him almost every night, I think about him 24/7. It's been 6 months since he passed away and I'm still in love with him and want him back. I literally have fake conversations with him in my head, and I make up fake scenarios with him in my head. I think my body has reacted to his death badly because ever since he passed away, I've had all kinds of health issues and bodily pain. I don't care about being with anyone else, there was no one like him, he was so special.

I'm hoping there's some kind of afterlife where I can be with him or at least my soul or spirit can reunite with his. But even if there's no afterlife, eternal sleep is better than living. I just want to join him.

I have to wait until I have enough money next month to purchase Sn and a hotel room. Probably would've done it sooner but I didn't know about Sn until now.

M'y boyfriend IS dead in 2022 may
It was THE love of my life

 

[3/4Dead]

I'm sorry to hear that, I can't imagine now much this hurts for you. For your sake i also wish for some kind of afterlife.

 

[GoSan1]

Thank you so much. It's so cruel because I had such a lonely life before I met him. I always wanted someone to love and to love me back. And then he came into my life and gave me so much love, and I loved him back. Then he passed away, and now I'm lonely again and so heartbroken. I hope I will be reunited with him too!

That hurts my heart so bad. I have always been lonely and now is no different. I used to wish that too but I don't think I would be lovable now, and to think about finding someone just for them to die, I honestly would ctb myself too. Thats so cruel. I am so sorry, I truly pray you 2 get reunited. I fucking hate all of this, this is too much-

 

[L'absent]

I completely understand the pain you're feeling, as I've been living with this immense loss for six months as well. Every corner of my life is filled with memories, and there's no place where I don't think of them. That empty feeling, that part of you that's gone, is always there, unrelenting. There are no words that can truly ease this pain. It's a daily struggle, but you are not alone— we're in this together.

 

[human909]

I am so sorry for the pain you have to deal with. I know what losing a loved one feels like, the pain of never ever getting to talk to them again and it feels like all the happiness has gone from the world. I will pray that you get reunited with your boyfriend soon.

 

[BlueButterfly111]

I just want to be reunited with my best friend who I was in love with too. He was so special and he died just under a month ago. The pain and grief is unbearable. I just want to join him in death and be with him. I also hope there is enough of an afterlife for us to be together too. If not I'll settle for dying the same way as him (also SN) and thinking about the other. I'm so sorry this has also happened to you. The pain is too much, we should be euthanized.

Anna

I'm so sorry for your loss as well. A month is like a minute, it felt like the world didn't exist around me after the first month. It really is so painful. I hope both of us will be reunited with our beloved again one day.

I am so sorry for your loss. Someone leaving so young and with so much promise ahead is so unfair -- unfair to them, unfair to those who love them, and unfair to the world. May peace be with you and you get to reunite with your beloved soon.

Yes that's true. Thank you so much I really appreciate it.

M'y boyfriend IS dead in 2022 may
It was THE love of my life

I can't imagine having to live with the pain for so long. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I'm sorry to hear that, I can't imagine now much this hurts for you. For your sake i also wish for some kind of afterlife.

Thank you so much. I really appreciate that a lot.

I completely understand the pain you're feeling, as I've been living with this immense loss for six months as well. Every corner of my life is filled with memories, and there's no place where I don't think of them. That empty feeling, that part of you that's gone, is always there, unrelenting. There are no words that can truly ease this pain. It's a daily struggle, but you are not alone— we're in this together.

I'm so sorry for your loss, wow we both have lost our loved one 6 months ago! I can relate, and it's so true that there are no words to ease the pain. Thank you so much for saying that, It's nice to know I'm not alone, and if you need someone to talk to I'm here for now!

I am so sorry for the pain you have to deal with. I know what losing a loved one feels like, the pain of never ever getting to talk to them again and it feels like all the happiness has gone from the world. I will pray that you get reunited with your boyfriend soon.

Thank you so much, I'm so sorry you had to experience this as well. I hope I will be reunited again with him too, and I appreciate you so much for saying that!

That hurts my heart so bad. I have always been lonely and now is no different. I used to wish that too but I don't think I would be lovable now, and to think about finding someone just for them to die, I honestly would ctb myself too. Thats so cruel. I am so sorry, I truly pray you 2 get reunited. I fucking hate all of this, this is too much-

Thank you so much. I'm so sorry for the loneliness that you have to experience, I know how you feel, you're not alone.

 

[outrider567]

I have dreams about him almost every night, I think about him 24/7. It's been 6 months since he passed away and I'm still in love with him and want him back. I literally have fake conversations with him in my head, and I make up fake scenarios with him in my head. I think my body has reacted to his death badly because ever since he passed away, I've had all kinds of health issues and bodily pain. I don't care about being with anyone else, there was no one like him, he was so special.

I'm hoping there's some kind of afterlife where I can be with him or at least my soul or spirit can reunite with his. But even if there's no afterlife, eternal sleep is better than living. I just want to join him.

I have to wait until I have enough money next month to purchase Sn and a hotel room. Probably would've done it sooner but I didn't know about Sn until now.

Dreams haunt me too, Jan 22 will be three years since my girlfriend of 35 years passed away, the nightmare of her last 4 days in the hospital as her life was slowly slipping away, those days still burning in my brain, the shock and tears endless, still making my life a living hell

 

[Peter Skellern]

Dreams haunt me too, Jan 22 will be three years since my girlfriend of 35 years passed away, the nightmare of her last 4 days in the hospital as her life was slowly slipping away, those days still burning in my brain, the shock and tears endless, still making my life a living hell

Seeing a love one pass in hospital and the days/weeks beforehand are a truly torturous experience. I'm dreadfully sorry for your loss

 

[outrider567]

Seeing a love one pass in hospital and the days/weeks beforehand are a truly torturous experience. I'm dreadfully sorry for your loss

Thank you

 

[astonishedturnip]

No matter how psychologists love to truss it up, grief is such an abominable emotion. Call me a sociopath, but I sort of wish we evolved to no longer feel grief. It is such a life-ruining emotion that never leaves you, unless you get lobotomized perhaps. And worst yet, we're pretty much all doomed to feel it because none of us are getting out of here alive.

I've felt how you feel, except in regards to my family. Either I CTB and see them in the afterlife or I CTB and it's just a comfortable void where I no longer feel the pain of the loss. When you put it in that perspective, it kind of makes all the doggedly pro-life people who condescendingly insist you live with grief, look like chumps lmao.

I'm so happy for you that you managed to find that love in your life, and I wish I could take away your pain of having lost it. I'm so fucking sorry.

 

[Peter Skellern]

No matter how psychologists love to truss it up, grief is such an abominable emotion. Call me a sociopath, but I sort of wish we evolved to no longer feel grief. It is such a life-ruining emotion that never leaves you, unless you get lobotomized perhaps. And worst yet, we're pretty much all doomed to feel it because none of us are getting out of here alive.

I've felt how you feel, except in regards to my family. Either I CTB and see them in the afterlife or I CTB and it's just a comfortable void where I no longer feel the pain of the loss. When you put it in that perspective, it kind of makes all the doggedly pro-life people who condescendingly insist you live with grief, look like chumps lmao.

I'm so happy for you that you managed to find that love in your life, and I wish I could take away your pain of having lost it. I'm so fucking sorry.

I hope we all see our friends and family loved ones in the afterlife.

 

[astonishedturnip]

I hope we all see our friends and family loved ones in the afterlife.

I believe we will, truly.

My grandma (died before I was born) apparently cried out for her dad on her deathbed, not out of fear but joy, as if she had just seen him step out in front of her.

I have read tons of NDEs and similar accounts that say the same thing and bolster this belief.

Some choose to believe otherwise of course. But I've seen signs, personally, that just couldn't be explained otherwise.

And I can't think of a fate those who suffer deserve more than a hug that lasts eternity...

 

[Peter Skellern]

I believe we will, truly.

My grandma (died before I was born) apparently cried out for her dad on her deathbed, not out of fear but joy, as if she had just seen him step out in front of her.

I have read tons of NDEs and similar accounts that say the same thing and bolster this belief.

Some choose to believe otherwise of course. But I've seen signs, personally, that just couldn't be explained otherwise.

And I can't think of a fate those who suffer deserve more than a hug that lasts eternity...

Yes so have I - seen things that are difficult, bordering on the impossible to explain rationally otherwise.

 

[hisfailedprotector]

I have dreams about him almost every night, I think about him 24/7. It's been 6 months since he passed away and I'm still in love with him and want him back. I literally have fake conversations with him in my head, and I make up fake scenarios with him in my head. I think my body has reacted to his death badly because ever since he passed away, I've had all kinds of health issues and bodily pain. I don't care about being with anyone else, there was no one like him, he was so special.

I'm hoping there's some kind of afterlife where I can be with him or at least my soul or spirit can reunite with his. But even if there's no afterlife, eternal sleep is better than living. I just want to join him.

I have to wait until I have enough money next month to purchase Sn and a hotel room. Probably would've done it sooner but I didn't know about Sn until now.

I know this feeling, I'm fortunate enough that the person I love is still alive but the loss is crushing, I can't even imagine how much pain you're going through.

 

[BlueButterfly111]

I believe we will, truly.

My grandma (died before I was born) apparently cried out for her dad on her deathbed, not out of fear but joy, as if she had just seen him step out in front of her.

I have read tons of NDEs and similar accounts that say the same thing and bolster this belief.

Some choose to believe otherwise of course. But I've seen signs, personally, that just couldn't be explained otherwise.

And I can't think of a fate those who suffer deserve more than a hug that lasts eternity...

Wow that's beautiful, I've also seen signs that I couldn't explain. I'm not religious, but I would describe myself as a spiritual agnostic person. For example, I had a dream about my boyfriend passing away a few months before he passed away, (he didn't die by suicide or something expected.)

I talked about on this post feeling so connected with him, and I've felt that way even after his death as well. Maybe some would call it just me being delusional or dealing with grief, but I swear I've seen angel numbers and all types of signs and symbols. Just last night I had a dream about him where I saw him again, hugged him and kissed him and it just felt so real. Idk how to explain it, I woke up this morning still feeling his energy. I can feel his energy really strongly sometimes, even though it's been almost 7 months since he passed away. And his energy is so comforting to me because my soul feels so close to his. No one understands, I can't talk to anyone about it. So I just keep it to myself, and sometimes post about it online since he passed away. And plus it's hard to explain, and when I try to explain it to certain people, they act like they don't understand or care. Like they don't really take me seriously, so I just stopped doing that.

I feel like some people, like maybe his family, would feel like I wouldn't be with him when I die maybe because they are religious and I am committing suicide. And that's something I think about too, because like, I love him, but they also love him too, so it's kind of confusing. But I think the other side is more difficult for us to understand. And why could it not be both? But idk like I said I'm not religious but I feel like in a way there's just something more, and it's hard for me to believe I wouldn't be with him again in some way. I just don't know, that's why I call myself agnostic, but I just have felt and seen things that I can't explain.

I don't have all the answers, I just wanted to share that with you. Thank you for the kind words!