I think Im going to try to ctb just now

[kingkong57]

I was planning on waiting until the end of the week because of work but I just can't bear this any longer. I'm using benzos and alcohol, I know the risks and possible consequences if I fail.

I used to take pride in my intelligence and always yearn to learn anything and everything but the longer I've lived the less I want to know.

I worry that perhaps death is worse than life. I hope it's an eternal sleep but do we really know that for sure?
I don't think I'm superstitious nor am I religious. nihilism speaks volumes to me more than anything.

I've really effed things up.

Will update in 30mins or so once I've taken at least 20 tablets

 

[FuneralCry]

I really hope that death is eternal sleep as well. I'm sorry that things are so hopeless, I understand that it is hard to carry on when you are suffering so much. Whatever happens, I wish you the best.

 

[dreadpirateroberts69]

Benzos with alcohol would be the method I would choose if I could guarantee it to work, but I would have no idea how many to take. I'm sorry life has brought you here, I wish you peace <3

 

[Muse]

I hope you will find some peace.

 

[Ta555]

I'm really sorry you're at this point, I feel I'm almost at this point myself but I don't think benzos and alcohol alone will kill you.

 

[Crazy4u]

How are you feeling now? can you take a few days off work?

 

[charlemagne]

Hoping u are resting peacefully if ure not here anymore

 

[LoneMisery]

My experience with that mix is just sleeping long periods of time till its out your system. If this is the route u want to take dont be suprised you wake up in the icu. Happened to me 2 3 times.
Best Wishes