I keep going back and forth. I took 3 mg of Ativan rn

[trying ungracefully]

Yesterday was a really good day. I felt so happy.

Today something happened and it hurt so badly. My boyfriend doesn't love me anymore I think. There is a big sign where he gets annoyed when I talk to him. "Can we play a game" -> "Omgg give me a minute" (never a minute and he gets more annoyed when I ask again", "where are you going" -> "I'm going to the bathroommm". "can we call" -> "give me 15 minutes" (never 15 minutes and he gets annoyed when I ask again).

He doesn't give a fuck and doesn't want to talk about it. "It's 2pm in the afternoon". Okay? The day has been started.

My body felt weird and my heart hurt so impulsively I took 3mg of ativen when I am prescribed .5-1. I've taken it before so I know how loopy and tired it makes me and I wanted that. I want to sleep the rest of the day and I can't do that naturally.

It's hard going through the ups and downs of life. Especially when something so good happens just the day before. Things like this can last longer than the good moments and it's a battle of what wins. I'm trying not to let the bad feelings win anymore but sometimes I want them to take over because giving up is easier.

 

[vibri]

Yeah, romantic partners can be great and all but they can cause a lot of distress when you feel like things aren't going well... I hope he can stop being a dick and listen to your concerns about feeling unloved by him

 

[sifp]

Yesterday was a really good day. I felt so happy.

Today something happened and it hurt so badly. My boyfriend doesn't love me anymore I think. There is a big sign where he gets annoyed when I talk to him. "Can we play a game" -> "Omgg give me a minute" (never a minute and he gets more annoyed when I ask again", "where are you going" -> "I'm going to the bathroommm". "can we call" -> "give me 15 minutes" (never 15 minutes and he gets annoyed when I ask again).

He doesn't give a fuck and doesn't want to talk about it. "It's 2pm in the afternoon". Okay? The day has been started.

My body felt weird and my heart hurt so impulsively I took 3mg of ativen when I am prescribed .5-1. I've taken it before so I know how loopy and tired it makes me and I wanted that. I want to sleep the rest of the day and I can't do that naturally.

It's hard going through the ups and downs of life. Especially when something so good happens just the day before. Things like this can last longer than the good moments and it's a battle of what wins. I'm trying not to let the bad feelings win anymore but sometimes I want them to take over because giving up is easier.

I'm happy that you have ups and down. I have had no ups in the past year or so. Just memory to moment meaningless suffering. Funny you mentioned Ativan. A 2mg Ativan dose is the only thing that stops the SIs. Did 3 mg dose help at all?

 

[trying ungracefully]

I'm happy that you have ups and down. I have had no ups in the past year or so. Just memory to moment meaningless suffering. Funny you mentioned Ativan. A 2mg Ativan dose is the only thing that stops the SIs. Did 3 mg dose help at all?

Yeah 3mg helps. For the first time it was a big reaction where I could barely walk straight and was out of it and feeling sick. This time I just took a nap and woke up feeling good. if I wanted to I could sleep right now too. It slows down thoughts too. I'm not thinking about much and when I try to intentionally think about things it's hard.

 

[sifp]

Glad it helped. Such a shame you're not supposed to take it every day.