Venting I have nothing going on with my life

[NihilusVan]

Four months ago I dropped out of my Philosophy degree. I didn't know what to do, I was tired, I didn't want to read or write or leave my house. I'm tired and I don't know tired of what exactly; my mom keeps a roof over my head but I don't have anything else, no abilities, no talents, nothing. I'm clumsy, awkward, slow-pased and witless. I wished I could just disappear to spare my mother and my dog the suffering, but it isn't possible. I don't want to stand up. Even though I want friends and a boyfriend, and helping others feel satisfaction, elation and joy, but I feel defeated and I can't talk to anyone. They always say I'm weak, perhaps they're right.

 

[Wojaczek]

same, i've been a failure all my life and im doing it again, failing seems to be the only thing i can do.

i do not have the strength to be constantly warding off all these ailments and responsibilities.

i'm basically rendered useless once i reach my limit, tend to hide away and act like i don't exist.

this is where im at right now.

 

[OnMyLast Legs]

It's amazing how little I can do. I'm 36 and I never learned anything. I've been so lazy since I was a kid. Pleading "mental health" as an adult got me more down time living at home to be lazy. I simply have no discipline or courage. I am a ruined soul.

The way out is the noose but guess what, I'm too cowardly for that too.