Venting I feel so cold, my soul is tired

[Bedrock48]

I wish I was able to ctb tonight. Been feeling my soul getting more weary as the days pass this week. Sat in bed with a hot chocolate and some candles lit. Just trying to bring some warmth back.

My only hope is that God takes my soul back in my sleep tonight. I pray for almost anything except me having to do it myself. Nobody I know knows this pain, I'm glad they don't.

I'm tired beyond measure. Sorry to be a downer but I'm fed up of pretending I'm coping.

 

[Snake of Eden]

I feel the same way too. I dont think I have it in me to bring my own demise but who knows if it will happen maybe in a moment of total desperation. until then i keep praying for a peaceful death while asleep

 

[suisuiforum]

My greatest wish is to die in my sleep without having a hand in it at all. Regardless of any positive events that happened in the past or will happen in the future, I will always go to sleep with the hope of never waking up.

Don't worry about being a downer, it's all par for the course here. I wish it wasn't like this, but at least people here understand how horrible life can be and won't throw out a bunch of canned, shallow responses.

 

[TheEndTimes]

I think about dying as much now as I thought about sex when I was 19, which is to say several times an hour.

 

[FuneralCry]

I can relate, I feel more and more tired as time goes by. Upon my every waking moments is feelings of dread and hopelessness. Life really is just a constant struggle. To fall asleep and never wake is the thing that I want as well. Death is a comfort to me.

 

[Bedrock48]

at least people here understand how horrible life can be and won't throw out a bunch of canned, shallow responses.

Couldn't have said it nearly as well as you did. Most people on here are quite uncensored (in the good sense). It truly does help.

I think about dying as much now as I thought about sex when I was 19, which is to say several times an hour.

All I can really say is I'm sorry. I hope things improve in whatever way is possible.

Death is a comfort to me.

Heavily relate. Sometimes that's the only thing getting me through the day.

 

[Bedrock48]

"My life is hanging by a thread that is about to break
Suicidal tendencies burn inside the mind of this miserable [person]"

"Stuck on the tightrope
Staring down to the void beneath
In imposed equilibrium
I stand swinging in my indecision
Uncompassionate result of a fearing existence
I don't care if my time has come
All I want is my liberation"

The Fool ~ Fleshgod Apocalypse
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I think about this song a lot. When is the right time to give up? Would people understand my decision to give up now? I feel myself on that tightrope today. Feet barefoot and bleeding from bearing down on the line yet somehow still in defiance of gravity. It all hurts. How do I reach recovery, is that even possible?

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