I feel like if any other person had my life they would be able to manage it and live on

[przeciwwymiotne]

I feel like my only problem is self discipline and lack of incentive. People achieve great things despite spine injuries, joint degeneration, brain damage, eating disorders and gut problems. If I was only a little bit more patient, hard working and selfless my life could have been useful in some way.

 

[FuneralCry]

I don't think that I would be able to manage any kind of life personally. I'm simply not meant for living. I will never be able to understand those who want to carry on living under such extreme suffering. It sounds so horrible having all those health problems you mentioned. Just the fact that they exist is enough to make me want to leave this world.

 

[Hope:-)]

I think anyone would at least contemplate suicide having had my life.

Maybe recovery is reachable for you? That would be great x

 

[broken_songbird]

I don't think that I would be able to manage any kind of life personally. I'm simply not meant for living. I will never be able to understand those who want to carry on living under such extreme suffering. It sounds so horrible having all those health problems you mentioned. Just the fact that they exist is enough to make me want to leave this world.

Well said. I agree.

I feel like my only problem is self discipline and lack of incentive. People achieve great things despite spine injuries, joint degeneration, brain damage, eating disorders and gut problems. If I was only a little bit more patient, hard working and selfless my life could have been useful in some way.

That's a great way to blame yourself. Folks who achieve a lot in life despite huge obvious obstacles are rare. That's why we celebrate them. And if I've learned anything, most of these people had a lot of support from the human animals around them. It's just sexier to present an underprivileged individual as having overcome all odds, rather than present them as part of a team. And a lot of times those folks are unhappy. I was at a dinner with a Nobel prize winner who had given the same speech and answered the same blowhard questions every day (sometimes twice!) for a year. All he wanted was to be at home with his beautiful wife and year-old twins. Refusing to tap dance in that realm can have dire consequences, so he chose to dance and be miserable and financially support his family rather than stay home and build resentment for his family simply because he chose time over money. Not much choice. And a crappy incentive.

 

[distantfields]

I struggle with this feeling a lot too. I see others dealing with my exact issues and they've gone on to recover (or at least keep up the pretense) and it only makes me feel inferior, therefore fueling my desire to end this due to perceiving myself as weak. It's unfortunate that comparing ourselves to others is so natural.

 

[Rational man]

Sickness is hard.on many levels of the human psyche. Being ill, ive lost focus in everything other than planning my exit from this sick body.

 

[Pluto]

I've had this thought many times. It feels like I am uniquely disabled in some way that is impossible to pinpoint. Maybe just not well suited to this planet.

I mean, even the pigeons on the street do a better job of living than I do. I don't even need to bring humans into it.

 

[theboy]

The same happens to me. It's like life wasn't made for me.

 

[Euthanza]

I looked at celebrities who had the best in their life still committed suicide. Even Korean former president Roh Moo Hyun decided to jump, such a great brave man.

 

[Regrets]

I feel like if any other person had my life he/she would have CTBed years ago.
A friend told me he would have.

 

[melodrama]

I personally feel the exact same thing. It's no news that I'm weak... However, I think anyone who went through the same mental restlessness as me would think about suicide at least once. It's hard to live when your own mind doesn't give you peace.

 

[IfyouareamanWinston]

I looked at celebrities who had the best in their life still committed suicide. Even Korean former president Roh Moo Hyun decided to jump, such a great brave man.

Just like most of us people will only says nice things after we are gone

 

[Messgram]

People achieve great things despite spine injuries, joint degeneration, brain damage, eating disorders and gut problems.

These people may still have other qualities that you don't have and that's why they manage to stand out. Just because you don't have any physical disabilities doesn't mean your situation is any easier than those who do.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I do understand where you are coming from but at the same time, I don't think it does anyone any favours to add guilt into the mix. I guess it could be beneficial if we look at how other people overcome their 'worse' problems and feel inspired by it but I think most of the time- this doesn't happen- we just feel inadequate for not doing the same.

Plus, appearances can be deceptive. Some people give off the impression they are coping when really- they're struggling underneath. As of now- all of us here are still alive- so- we've fought whatever it is up till this point. Not sure if you want to see that as an achievement...

Also- it's not a competition. I suppose it depends on your beliefs but I personally feel like if a person takes their own life- they are justified to do it because to them- life had become intolerable. It's not just life situation, it's your ability to cope with life. I'm not sure we all have the same shitty life tolerance level- I don't even know how we attain that- genetics, upbringing, self development, social support.

In any case, I kind of feel like the hardest factor to get over is apathy- which comes along with depression. If you deep down see no point in even trying, it's incredibly hard to pull yourself out of that dark place.

All I would say is- don't be so hard on yourself. It's just another stick to beat yourself with. You are you. No one else knows what it's like to be you. You have the right to feel like you can't cope- just the same as everyone else does. Guess it's up to all of us to try and deal with our own obstacles as best we can. I wish you luck.

 

[SexyIncél]

And if I've learned anything, most of these people had a lot of support from the human animals around them. It's just sexier to present an underprivileged individual as having overcome all odds, rather than present them as part of a team. And a lot of times those folks are unhappy. I was at a dinner with a Nobel prize winner who had given the same speech and answered the same blowhard questions every day (sometimes twice!) for a year. All he wanted was to be at home with his beautiful wife and year-old twins. Refusing to tap dance in that realm can have dire consequences, so he chose to dance and be miserable and financially support his family rather than stay home and build resentment for his family simply because he chose time over money. Not much choice. And a crappy incentive.

I agree. We're social animals. We team up to accomplish things. And it's often unequal: the Nobel prize winner maybe has someone cleaning his house so he can focus on his work; has people serving him at restaurants. That's an example of teamwork, though not great for the servants

If anyone else had your life, they'd be you. And thus do exactly what you did.

BTW, people look at all my advantages and say they'd be so happy if they had my life. Ok, I'm sure they can find someone happy with THEIR lives.

 

[Girl-shaped Wound]

I'm simply not meant for living.

Same here. My mind always was meant to collapse on itself. I cannot exist without psychiatric medication, and even then I'm in pain

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Given my circumstances, most people would pull it together and find a way to persevere and even thrive. But I'm a perfect storm of poor qualities- a history of quitting, incompetence, and self sabotage. Also low energy and lack of inspiration.

 

[broken_songbird]

I agree. We're social animals. We team up to accomplish things. And it's often unequal: the Nobel prize winner maybe has someone cleaning his house so he can focus on his work; has people serving him at restaurants. That's an example of teamwork, though not great for the servants

If anyone else had your life, they'd be you. And thus do exactly what you did.

BTW, people look at all my advantages and say they'd be so happy if they had my life. Ok, I'm sure they can find someone happy with THEIR lives.

SO well said. Thank you. You're absolutely right.

 

[hamvil]

I feel this all the time. I watched a TV series where there was a machine that could transfer life force from a person to another. So if you are terminal another person could donate his/her life and you could live again. In the TV series the person donating the life force was slowly falling asleep without pain. I would like so much to do this.