I failed 6 months ago

[Shadow_]

I failed six months ago.

The feeling was nothing like I had felt before. I had tied the ligature to a doorknob on the other side. When it failed and I came too, the adrenaline was incredible. The heat was another weird aspect. I stripped pert near naked and listened to the phone ring next to me (I sent a suicide text and then put my phone in my pocket and stepped off the chair). It was surreal. Reality felt like it wasn't (due to the adrenaline and oxygen depravation). It was wild. Police came to my door later and I told them i way still here, and there was no reason to be there so they could leave, I shut the door, and they did. Not right away. I left my apartment building 1-2 minutes later for a cigarette, and they were still there. I didn't make eye contact, I didn't say a word. I have tried to live a normal life since then. Success is measured individually, and I definitely can say it has not been one for me. Things may improve. They may not. All of that is to be determined. I can not say how long I will be around to experience it.

 

[hell toupee]

Ya, the more I read about partial - the more I'm convinced that a lot of things have to go right for it to succeed - at least for most people.

Why did you fail? Did your rope or anchor break?

 

[Shadow_]

I'm in a mood so I understand my post will not convey niceties, and I am sorry for that.

But did you read the post? I did not tie a proper tie at the anchor point on the doorknob, it failed.

For more information, this was not a partial. I attempted a full hanging. This was my second attempt. My first one had a nail that was not hammered into a stud. That was many years, and several attempts ago. I am very obviously not good at this.