how did your family react to your attempt??

[kindawannacrylol]

How did your family/friends react to your ctb attempt?

 

[untimelydemise]

ive had so many they just say do you want to go back to hospital and engage. friends dont know and most family are just told ita my autism and im in hoapital for anxiety which doesnt make sense but who cares. they just say why is ir worse each time but im in aupoorted living and hoapital for the past year and a bit and was in hospia for about 8 months before that with attempts and a+e trips often. i was only 14 last time

 

[Life_and_Death]

my husband seemed to have panicked and i feel shocked would be a good word for my friend. not surprised, hes known im suicidal but when i asked how he felt, i think it was kind of like an empty oh god feeling i guess.

 

[botanormal]

My mother found me once during an attempt and asked what I was doing. When I told her I was attempting, she just laughed & went on with her day like nothing had happened. We never talked about it again. To give her the benefit of the doubt - I think she was just shocked and felt too uncomfortable to ever bring it up again. Still sucked though!

 

[WornOutLife]

Most of family panicked but the most affected one (and only one who really loves me) was my dad. I felt soooo sorry because of my failed attempt that I decided to give life one more shot and try to make my dad happy but of course, it's really difficult to live just for others.

 

[BandAddict]

Some of them I can't remember, but usually my mom comes across as stern, but concerned. Takes me to the hospital, and one time she cried talking to the doctors. I felt horrible for doing that to her. Last time my sibling panicked but my mom had been drinking and didn't register it. Ambulance took me that time while my mom was hauled off to jail for a bit. She felt bad, but we don't talk about that part of the night.

 

[EmptyManForever]

My parents didn't take it that seriously when I told them I attempted, but have been supportive ever since, and my only friend was a little shocked by my attempt

 

[Tkmiz_Tsukumizu]

My mom walked in on me hanging myself and all I remember was her face going absolutely pale and crying "Don't leave me alone, what would I do without you?" Ever since then I feel terrible for causing that kind of pain to her.

 

[Mentalmick]

No idea. Don't care.

 

[AN IDIOT'S END]

No idea. Don't care.

wig

 

[TriggerHappy]

my family did love me though... now we estranged: but i crashed my sportscar, lost my religion, sposed to do jailtime - so my family lovingly commited me to desert Christian care centre: don't have a problem with the Christian thing (they were super homophobic) luckily i'm a tough farmboy so i survived (it's internationally known to be hectic) I ran away and relapsed. stoopid me: sum advice: please reach out and take whatever help is given you; even if it doesn't make sense. i only write that as my options have dwindled to zero (welcome to rockbottom, baby....)

 

[Symbiote]

My wife thought I faked it and had bribed the doctors to make it look like I was in a coma so she would feel bad. She said if I was really serious, I should've gone to the forest instead of a parking lot.

 

[Tkmiz_Tsukumizu]

My wife thought I faked it and had bribed the doctors to make it look like I was in a coma so she would feel bad. She said if I was really serious, I should've gone to the forest instead of a parking lot.

Why are you still married to this person.

 

[Symbiote]

Why are you still married to this person.

Divorce is much harder to go through than suicide. Suicide way way easier, divorce just fucks you over in the long run.

 

[Tkmiz_Tsukumizu]

Divorce is much harder to go through than suicide. Suicide way way easier, divorce just fucks you over in the long run.

I thought so, divorce seems like a long process and emotionally exhausting not to mention expensive..

 

[fresca]

My sister did nothing. My mom cried. My dad was pissed off at me. I regret failing the attempt.

 

[KuriGohan&Kamehameha]

When I was a teenager I was groomed by an older man who basically kept me hostage for a long period. I failed an attempt when I was living with him, as I threw up before the drugs could take effect. I had written a note and he found it and punished me greatly for it.

He was upset at first, but quickly started using my note as blackmail in an attempt to control me. At one point he threatened to show the note to my few remaining family members, tell law enforcement that I was a basket case with my tangible suicidal ideation as proof, and have me involuntary sectioned to a psych ward in an attempt to get revenge against me.

I learned then how little trust I could actually put in people and that they didn't really care if I lived or died. Still, it feels like I never seem to learn from my social mistakes, as I have had similar callous responses happen again years later.

A few weeks ago I attempted partial hanging. I regretfully confessed to my boyfriend as well as a couple of friends. My boyfriend was furious and told me that my being suicidal was disrespectful to his family, and that I have no regard for others if I would want to ctb in their house. He insisted that I am unhinged and unpredictable as a consequence of my desire to die.

One of my friends whom I confided in tried to be supportive at first, then started saying he didn't want to be held liable and debated calling the crisis team or cops on me so that he wouldn't get in trouble if anyone found out that I'd spoken to him about my attempt. Eventually I talked him down, because frankly, that bullshit would have made my situation 1000x worse.

The narrative that is pushed by the world at large is one which dictates that you should reach out and that people are here for you, but in my experience no one has ever really cared about me when I've attempted ctb. They cared more about the stigma of my desire for death, and the social shame it could potentially bring upon them, rather than the extent to which I am suffering- pain so bad that it compels me to orchestrate my suicide.

I do wish people honestly cared, but that's probably too much to ask for in my life. I have pretty much no family, by the way, except two people whom I try not to involve in any of this.

 

[Ardesevent]

I got a speech from my dad on how he couldn't survive without me, then it was swept under the rug.

 

[itsallover]

The usual oh my god we're going to lose him because he's tubed up in the ICU clinging onto life, and then after some time in the psych ward back to the same old debilitated state of my life going nowhere.

 

[Stress]

"Why not go to a temple and do volunteer work? It will wash away ur depression." "Why are u doing stupid things in ur life and causing so much trouble to ur parents?" " ur life is so cheap." " why not cut off ur whole hand? " "overdose if u want, not like we owe u anything." " she is fine." "Crazy. Really become crazy after coming back from the mental hospital." "Ur work and school will not accept u if u keep attempting." "U gave us depression because of how u are acting." "How to help u wen u barely talk." "I should be the one that is depressed because i have cancer and not u." "Treasure ur life" "we didnt have high expectations" "ur mom did that cause she cared for u and she just worried for u" " if i am angry i would also threaten u with knife." Etc.

Basically my parents said these and more. So much more till i can write maybe a novel. My mom is a narcist. My dad rarely at home but came back due to covid. My mom usually complain abt me to my dad over phone. So wen i was in the hospital my mom played victim and my dad believed her cause she is an elder. My dad is the closest but my mom drifted me and him apart...i had to go through so much abuse and on going emotional and psychological abuse...luckily the physical abuse and humiliation in public stopped..

Wen i was in hospital 10 days after my birthday they cared abt school and reputation more than my well being. My dad was worried but didnt know how to express..since my mom would pressure my dad to say things tht she wants me to hear.

My dad is genuinely worried but my mom nvr got worried just her own narcist behavior..and guilt tripping me. Thinking i am enjoying my life and freedom in the hospital meanwhile i was having so bad anxiety attack cause worried of my mom till i had to sign a form to not let my mom visit me...

Friends shocked cause i always bubbly and smile and extroverted on the outside. Always listen to their probs and nvr said anything abt my probs.

 

[whywere]

I have had 2 attempts, so far!, and I have no family at all, when my ex found out, she was like, what ever.

 

[Nolen]

My mother found me once during an attempt and asked what I was doing. When I told her I was attempting, she just laughed & went on with her day like nothing had happened. We never talked about it again. To give her the benefit of the doubt - I think she was just shocked and felt too uncomfortable to ever bring it up again. Still sucked though!

I had the exact same experience. I was also fairly young and I think if right measurers were taken and I got some help a lot could have been prevented but oh well kinda sucks.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

Typically.

 

[LifeQuitter2018]

To the people who failed your attempt, did your parents or guardian try to lock you in the house and put you on watch 24/7 ?
This is one of my biggest fear. Lose an attempt and don't get any other chance.

 

[Tiredofhurting]

No one knows. Only reason. I did bot ctb is because the anchor point I used was weak and bent down and the belt fell off the hook. I woke up idk how long later.

 

[Stress]

To the people who failed your attempt, did your parents or guardian try to lock you in the house and put you on watch 24/7 ?
This is one of my biggest fear. Lose an attempt and don't get any other chance.

Well my dad was really worried for me. He let me go out still but tried to message me a lot to make sure i was ok. My mom just called me troublesome and those nasty insults. But i couldnt close the door for a few weeks. And they took away my things tht i use to harm myself

 

[brokenwaves]

the few family members still in my life acted super super concerned...for about a week or two. now it's never spoken about and it's assumed i'm "over" that now. in the aftermath of my attempts, they made it completely about them. i don't wanna sound like an asshole but hearing "we would never be the same, it would destroy our lives, we would have to live the rest of our lives with that" isn't exactly what i needed to hear in that moment. they don't understand it at all, they think it's such a stupid and crazy thing to do because they think there's always hope and things always get better. well, not in my case - after 12+ years of severe mental illness & horrendous trauma i can't keep living carrying this darkness on my back. how am i meant to live in pain...just to prevent hurting these people. i wish i could just erase my existence so they'd feel no pain but unfortunately i can't do that - but i didn't ask to be born, so why blame me for wanting to put an end to it all?

 

[May]

To the people who failed your attempt, did your parents or guardian try to lock you in the house and put you on watch 24/7 ?
This is one of my biggest fear. Lose an attempt and don't get any other chance.

I was found out and watched for most of the evening till I ended up in hospital for a month. Once you are released nothing really happens as they don't have the resources to deal with you any more. You just get forgotten about and lost amongst all the paper work. People close to you do seem to be on edge because of it though. I guess suicide is still considered to be a taboo subject that isn't meant to be discussed.

 

[Unsure_about_living]

Mine reacted by trying to face the issue head-on but ten as soon as I attempted to answer any questions they changed the subject or interrupted me in awkwardness. To be fair, my sister has been muuuuuuch Better than my parents

 

[fred farkle]

My wife thought I faked it and had bribed the doctors to make it look like I was in a coma so she would feel bad. She said if I was really serious, I should've gone to the forest instead of a parking lot.

time for a dee-vorce?