Acoda
New Member
- Jan 6, 2024
- 4
My left hand/arm doesn't listen to my commands. Sounds weird, but it is what I am experiencing now. I can perfectly feel my hand but I can't control it with my will. It's like my subconsciousness, my inner self deliberately prevents my hand from moving. I can move freely other body parts except my left shoulder, arm and hand. They can move by instinct whether I am falling or if my hand is approaching danger like a hot kettle for example. They take actions in order in a way that my shoulder will take action first to protect the arm/hand and the arm second to protect the hand. The hand seems to be most the most impaired part.
The problem occurs when I am in heavy a depressive mood/headspace though not everytime I am in it. The problem occurs roughly every 8 months and lasts about 5 minutes. Sometimes it takes a different form where the hand/arm/shoulder moves by itself. Three years ago I had a first episode where the impairment lasted about a week. The first episode have a long story which includes topics like hysteria, mental asylum, depression and it is a very crucial moment in my life which I think requires full description. Yesterday I had a second big episode and now the problem has lasted 12 hours so far.
The circumstances, what preceded the problem, whys and hows, my theories I'll write down below or later if someone gets interested in the matter.
I am sorry if I sound gibberish or full on mad, but I am just looking for any clues to resolve the matter. Right now I am in my buddy's place and I don't wana go home cause I don't wanna end up in asylum again.
The problem occurs when I am in heavy a depressive mood/headspace though not everytime I am in it. The problem occurs roughly every 8 months and lasts about 5 minutes. Sometimes it takes a different form where the hand/arm/shoulder moves by itself. Three years ago I had a first episode where the impairment lasted about a week. The first episode have a long story which includes topics like hysteria, mental asylum, depression and it is a very crucial moment in my life which I think requires full description. Yesterday I had a second big episode and now the problem has lasted 12 hours so far.
The circumstances, what preceded the problem, whys and hows, my theories I'll write down below or later if someone gets interested in the matter.
I am sorry if I sound gibberish or full on mad, but I am just looking for any clues to resolve the matter. Right now I am in my buddy's place and I don't wana go home cause I don't wanna end up in asylum again.
