guilty and tired

[friendofbirds]

my heart rate was 120 earlier and i can feel my veins physically ache even laying down. i told my partner and they proceeded to have a meltdown over it. im so tired

the reason i havent ctb is guilt. i feel guilt all the time. i shouldnt feel guilt for telling someone im sick. i am not alive because i want to be but because i feel too guilty for how my loved ones would grieve me

one of these days im just gonna get in my car drive to my favorite park and ctb in peace. i wish i wasnt so lonely otherwise id just cut them off and do it now

 

[jimmy7754]

I drive out to the park a lot can't settle on a method wish I had N

 

[FuneralCry]

I can imagine that it must be a difficult situation to be in, wanting to leave this world so badly, yet not wanting to hurt others. I'm sorry that it has come to this point for you. I know that this life can be dreadful when you are so tired, I am also very tired of everything. I hope that you find relief from suffering.