Grief & ctbing

[ge0rge]

Hi! I'm interested in hearing your opinions on a subject that is very important to me. Without going too much into detail, I'd like to summarize that about 98% of my current ideation is due to overwhelming, world-shattering grief. I have had ideation before, and quite strong ideation at that, for a number of different reasons, but nothing compares to this. Yet sometimes my previous reasons mingle with the grief, and then everything resembles a jumbled mess that I can't really make heads or tails of. Am I simply using grief as another reason to CTB, is my grief not genuine, is it all opportunism? How should I separate my grief and loss from the grief and loss I feel towards myself and the people I will leave behind?

My question is: how has grief informed your desire to CTB? how does it change your perception of death and mortality?

 

[Hiraeth Grimoire]

Hello friend, I am not quite sure I know what you are grieving about, but I can most certainly relate to grief in general. Let's just say I am a failed idealist, I constantly and painfully desire for something reminiscent of a faraway home, that I found out this world is incapable of offering. Hiraeth and Fernweh are two words I can use to describe this profound sickness. In addition to this deep longing, I grieve the suffering of my fellow sentient creatures, because there is so much unnecessary carnage that serves no justifiable reason for which I can deduce. I am so sorry you are in the same or similar predicament. I think grief is a genuine response to the troubles of life, and I would most definitely say your grief is sincere. I hope you are able to find peace and freedom in your decision, whatever that may be.