GETTING WORSE

[StarryStarry]

I am now backed against the wall and will need to CTB. The lady who was going to buy the washer and dryer now doesn't want it. I was counting on that money. I have given my notice so I have to leave on March 1st. I emailed the firm where I had accepted the position asking if they would help me financially. This is the response I received:

The firm is unable to provide any sort of relocation assistance. If this does impact your acceptance please let us know as soon as possible as we did have some alternate candidates waiting on us.

I don't think I'll have enough to do this move and now I am fucked all the way around. My plans have changed. I'll leave Sweet Pea here and continue on to where my daughter is. I ctb there. I have no choice. My heart is broken - my sweet little girl. I have fucked my life up at every turn. I've made horrible decisions it's time to put myself out of my misery.

 

[Angi]

I am so sad to hear this! Moving is expensive, I know, but is there maybe a way you can dive through until your first paycheck? My first idea was couch surfing, sounds weird, but if it is about diving through the 2 or 4 weeks up to payday (I hope it is 2 in you case), then thinking out of the box could be worth it. Do you have a well known second-hand platform where you live? A not-too-expensive washer dryer would sell quite quickly where I live, maybe you can find a new buyer.

 

[StarryStarry]

I am so sad to hear this! Moving is expensive, I know, but is there maybe a way you can dive through until your first paycheck? My first idea was couch surfing, sounds weird, but if it is about diving through the 2 or 4 weeks up to payday (I hope it is 2 in you case), then thinking out of the box could be worth it. Do you have a well known second-hand platform where you live? A not-too-expensive washer dryer would sell quite quickly where I live, maybe you can find a new buyer.

I'm afraid time has run out for me. I just can't do this any more. Every decision I make is bad.

 

[OldDrummer]

*hugs*

 

[Angi]

I'm afraid time has run out for me. I just can't do this any more. Every decision I make is bad.

I get those very thoughts. Of course, you may get them for all different reasons, but in my case, they are cptsd talking. For these situations, I find this very helpful: http://www.pete-walker.com/pdf/13strategies_flashbacks_management.pdf If 13 steps are overwhelming, you could focus on 5, 7 and 8. If you manage to read more than this, there is a lot of valuable material on the same website. This might not be for you at all, but it sure helped me a lot, so I hope it can do something for you. And for your Sweet Pea. (I have to add my typo: Sweat Pea <.<)

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that things are so hopeless. I know that it can be dreadful when things just get worse. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[soinvisible]

I am so very sorry this is happening. I have seen some of your story on other posts and you have been through so much. If you decide to leave, please take Sweet Pea to a shelter/rescue or make sure 100% someone will find her in your apartment very soon. If she is there alone and no one does, she will have a very bad death which I know you would never want for her.