Finding the will to do it.

[CaliCatCharlie]

It's so hard finding the will to kill myself because of that stupid survival instinct and the uncertainty of the after-life. I want to so bad but my SI keeps getting in the way. I wish I had a gun, I'd be dead already. I'm already so tired of everything and it's not ever going to get better for me. I genuinely feel like this is it and have accepted that it is. My mind is spiraling out of control. I can't take it anymore it hurts!

 

[ClownMe]

I'm sorry to hear that, hopefully you will be able to leave soon and be at peace.

 

[Marktheghost]

There's no evidence that there is an after-life. I think it's safe to assume there is no after-life.

 

[Ednospatient]

when you die you simply cease to exist.

 

[Anxieyote]

Same here. I struggle greatly with the concept of going from "being" to "not being".

And how long would I "not be"? Would "not being" be pleasant? Would I even get to enjoy "not being" before particles arranged to place me in a new body?

Thinking about it makes me sad.

 

[CaliCatCharlie]

Yeah my mind always wonders about the aftermath. Though I do think there will probably be nothing in the afterlife. There's another thought that I'll just always be in a dream-state of mind. Basically in a alternate world or something where I'm not tied down by the barriers of actual life or maybe just a ghost going about the world. Who knows? I do hope it is nothing because all I have is nightmares. Lol

 

[FuneralCry]

The SI also holds me back as we are programmed to survive after all. If it was easier I would have been gone a long time ago. I do not believe there is any afterlife. I'm sorry you are suffering, I understand it is hard to carry on when everything is hopeless. I am also very tired of living. I hope you find the peace you are looking for.

 

[Lost21]

I share your predicament. I would be dead a long time ago if were not for SI

 

[Marktheghost]

Would "not being" be pleasant?

I spent approximately 13,800,000,000 years "not being" up till last century, and I can tell you from experience that it's neither pleasant nor unpleasant. It's literally just...nothing.