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Sslsh

Sslsh

Experienced
Jan 29, 2020
293
What are the odds of me dying because of taking too much stress? I am literally done with life. I want to cry myself to sleep but tears are not welling up. I'm so stressed that I feel my head will explode. I wish I could procure/use SN but thanks to covid restrictions, I'm stuck. Can't wait for the day I stop wasting oxygen.
 
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S

suicide4me

Student
Apr 1, 2021
104
Same here ... I also can't wait for the day I stop wasting oxygen. I am under so much stress combined with depression and anxiety I feel as if my head could explode at anytime. I feel your pain.
 
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BottomlessPit

BottomlessPit

Staring at the edge
Apr 28, 2021
423
I know that feeling of wanting to cry but being unable to produce tears for some reason. I'm sorry you have to deal with all that stress, it really sucks to have so much despair with no way out. The lack of freedom amplifies the despair for me.
 
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Sslsh

Sslsh

Experienced
Jan 29, 2020
293
Same here ... I also can't wait for the day I stop wasting oxygen. I am under so much stress combined with depression and anxiety I feel as if my head could explode at anytime. I feel your pain.
I keep rehearsing my plan to ctb in my mind. I may not get to do it for months, but that's the only thing that gives me any kind of solace right now
 
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suicide4me

Student
Apr 1, 2021
104
I keep rehearsing my plan to ctb in my mind. I may not get to do it for months, but that's the only thing that gives me any kind of solace right now
I am supposed to ctb this month, but now I have a whole bunch of personal shit to deal with and I may have to postpone. I agree, the only thing keeping me going is knowing I will ctb. I really hope I can do it this month as planned, but it may have to wait, which sucks.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
48,679
I know how you feel. I have a desire to leave this world but I struggle with thoughts of doing the act itself, it requires a lot of planning and courage. Our minds really like to torture us. This life literally is a prison, nobody deserves to suffer. I wish you well.
 
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avoid_slow_death

avoid_slow_death

Ready to embrace the peaceful bliss of the void.
Feb 4, 2020
1,356
I can do it any time. Nobody will come looking fir a few days at the very least. Problem is, I want to die, but I don't.

I want to stick around for the people I care for. Kinda. I actually go back and forth on this. "They love me. Would destroy them if I went", to, "Eh, there will be tears and sadness, but people will be fine". Its a very sad place to be....
 
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Sslsh

Sslsh

Experienced
Jan 29, 2020
293
I can do it any time. Nobody will come looking fir a few days at the very least. Problem is, I want to die, but I don't.

I want to stick around for the people I care for. Kinda. I actually go back and forth on this. "They love me. Would destroy them if I went", to, "Eh, there will be tears and sadness, but people will be fine". Its a very sad place to be....
That's sad. You have a big heart for wanting to stick around just for others.
 
IsThisTheEnd?

IsThisTheEnd?

Mange
Aug 6, 2020
585
I have this miserable feeling so often I wonder if I might have a stroke or heart attack but I don't think it will happen.
 
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Sslsh

Sslsh

Experienced
Jan 29, 2020
293
I have this miserable feeling so often I wonder if I might have a stroke or heart attack but I don't think it will happen.
People who want to live are dropping like flies. People who don't want to live keep suffering with no end in sight.
 
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