Don't think I can go on anymore

[Theresnoescape]

I've just found out today that my ex is seeing someone else. I mean, I really do want her to be happy but it's crushed me.

I would never kms solely because of that. It's just one thing after another in my life and I'm so tired of it, I'm broken.

I feel like I've done what I can to get better and move on, I've tried like 5 different antidepressants and I'm still the same, actually I'm much worse.

I have SN, anti sickness tablets, benzos and propranolol, but it honestly scares me. If it feels like I'm suffocating from inside the panic would be immense. I also have 8mm paracord if I wanted to go with fsh but that scares me too.

Why am I such a pussy, I need to just do it cos carrying on living is so unbearable, why the fuck was I born.

I have the house to myself for the week in about 5 weeks time, so if I don't do it then I'll be waiting another year, and I just can't do that.

Also, the thought of an afterlife worries me. There's no way I want to do it all again.

Sorry, rant over.

 

[bl33ding_heart]

That must be excruciatingly painful, and I know all too well what it feels like. A few months after I broke up with my ex I found out he'd been talking to this girl that I really disliked, and I was certain she had a crush on him before. Finding out about that honestly broke me and made me wanna kill myself, I get how soul crushing it can feel. I understand that something like this may feel like the icing on the cake. But I just really hope for you to not do anything impulsively. If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to drop me a message. I am wishing the best for you.

 

[Theresnoescape]

That must be excruciatingly painful, and I know all too well what it feels like. A few months after I broke up with my ex I found out he'd been talking to this girl that I really disliked, and I was certain she had a crush on him before. Finding out about that honestly broke me and made me wanna kill myself, I get how soul crushing it can feel. I understand that something like this may feel like the icing on the cake. But I just really hope for you to not do anything impulsively. If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to drop me a message. I am wishing the best for you.

Thank you so much, I appreciate it. After such a long relationship it's very hard to get over. I do genuinely wish the best for her, I just wish she wanted the best for me too .

That must have been especially hard for you, seeing as you already disliked her. I hope you're doing ok now though.