Venting Does anyone have stable relationships?

[bpder]

I can't seem to figure out relationships and how to keep them, I always seem to find people who hurt me. How do people have a big friendship group and romantic relationships?

 

[Al Cappella]

I haven't managed it. Not helpful, I know, but there it is.

 

[September5th]

Don't know if I can help you, as last time I checked I managed to fuck everything up with a woman who loved me since middle school, did everything she could for us at first and gave away her virginity to me... haha
That said, for most of the relationship, it was pretty good and stable. What you gotta do is find someone who makes you smile. It's not enough to just look for people who can put your pants on fire. From then on, it's all about not letting you sabotage the whole thing. No jealousy and no pressure, just fun. That way you'll be fine.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Ive had a great one back in 2014, but that was before my depression festered. Nowadays, i don't desire a romantic one and I haven't cared to interact with my "friends", either.

 

[Brianiskillingme]

Well ready my user name............I am not lucky in love.

 

[Slimetae]

Nope ican't relate to people mess up anything I usually have with a woman or friend bc of that I'm just disconnected from my emotions don't see the point in relationships Might be a psycho or something but I wish u the best in finding one .

 

[Hirokami]

In my last romantic relationship I was cheated on constantly as I'm not good enough, apparently. Even platonic relationships, as an adult, are jokes. Most of the adults I've met were shallow and incapable of having a conversation outside of what the mainstream media tells them to care about.

I think the issue is I'm just not compatible with most people. I've been told I was distant, quiet, and too serious by too many to count. And if I'm the black sheep, then how can I form stable relationships with anyone?

 

[CTBgenuine]

I've had past relationships, none were stable and all had a thread of abuse. I don't desire one now...even tho I'm very lonely. I don't want to put my bullshit onto another person. I just want to sleep and not wake up now!

 

[LeavingEarly]

I have schizoaffective disorder so none of my relationships worked. Everything was unstable.

 

[Ashu]

Yeah, unfortunately, a fifteen year old nightmare marriage I don't have the courage or cruelty to end.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I used to - I burned them all to the ground

 

[OpheliasFlowers]

As a young adult (meaning, age 18/19-24) I had one close friend and I guess that friendship was 'stable'. Later I found out though that it was not as genuine as I'd perceived it to be so maybe it couldn't be considered stable, really, I don't know. But after that (and I'm early 50s now) I've not had one platonic/friend, romantic or even familial relationship I'd describe as stable. I just don't know how to maintain relationships of any kind, but also I seem to attract, and gravitate towards, people who are narcissists, abusive, and/or users. I honestly can't even imagine what a TRULY healthy, stable relationship of any kind would be like, nor would I know how to cultivate or maintain one. I don't even feel worthy of one tbh

 

[BrokenLine]

No, the relationships the ones that matter to me i lose. Or i mean nothing to them.

 

[OpheliasFlowers]

Yeah, unfortunately, a fifteen year old nightmare marriage I don't have the courage or cruelty to end.

I'm so sorry. I'm in the same kind of situation so I can relate.

 

[NobodyKnowsMe]

I'm on my second marriage and approaching my 26th wedding anniversary. My first marriage lasted 9 years and I was the one that instigated the divorce. Given the number of times that my mother married & divorced, usually to alcoholics or abusers, thereby giving me no good relationship examples, I'm actually somewhat amazed I've managed what I have in that department. For me, I think the secret is to not get involved with anyone that is very needy, because I'm too broken to be able to fulfill that requirement. I'm fairly withdrawn, but I can definitely fake being okay -- hell, I've had many decades of practice at that. However, our relationship for the past decade or two, has been more like casual roommates.

I don't seem to be able to maintain regular friendships though, mostly because I isolate a lot. I keep people at a distance so that nobody can really get to know me, and thus cannot hurt me.

 

[its-about-time]

Noooo. I keep a strong emotional distance from friends. I'm somehow able to attract very wonderful romantic partners, but the relationships are far from stable -because of me- and I generally leave them before a year's end to spare them of my ongoing shit, though the last one had the wherewithal to leave me first. I am no longer pursuing such relationships.

 

[dreadpirateroberts69]

I have never had a romantic relationship and even many of my friendships have been racked with abuse and just... bad mojo. I think a lot of us here have shit luck with relationships

 

[Ashu]

I can't seem to figure out relationships and how to keep them, I always seem to find people who hurt me. How do people have a big friendship group and romantic relationships?

It's worth keeping in mind that romantic relationships are famously difficult even for normtards.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I have a relationship with me, myself and I. I don't know how stable it is, though. I don't think it is going to be a long lasting relationship, though, at least from this point forward.