Help does anyone else feel better when they feel bad? like does that make sense?

[imreadyplayerone]

like feeling awful about myself and encouraging myself to harm my self. makes me feel whole, smarter, above it all idk.
like ignoring messages from friends and family makes me feel superior.
like suffering makes me better or maybe i'm just so up myself that i delude myself into thinking i like it when i actually hate it.

anyway tell me how wrong and dumb i am please

 

[interna]

yes. makes me feel revindicated almost

 

[callmer]

Sometimes just letting your negative feelings take over can be relieving yes. I definitely relate.

 

[RatoftheCity]

I think, for me at least, it's part of being passively suicidal; where you aren't able to make a more active approach so you use little things to kind of chip away at you. I'm definitely like this through the ways you mentioned, and avoiding seeking treatment for any medical issues I have. It could also be the satisfaction of having control over something when you feel that you're letting yourself slowly slip away, so instead you choose to slip away on purpose.

 

[dragonofenvy]

Every time I have hope and think things are good it backfires. It's like the universe is cruelly allowing me the opportunity to escape from this prison before closing it off and laughing at me for having the audacity to try to escape.

 

[Asuraa]

yea. i think so. It feels weird to feel better almost to me. So i don't like it and try to avoid it. though i know this is bad of course and yet i cant help it