humans have done me a lot of dirt, so i'm not keen on seeing them.
i avoid eye contact whenever i can, because eye contact opens up for the chance of conversation, and i know there's a 95% chance i won't like you.
that doesn't make me rude, im just trying to protect my peace,
because whenever in the past i've tried talking to people, it usually ends up bad.
yesterday i was walking without hearing someone running behind me, so he startled me, so naturally i turned my head back very fast,
because i thought he could be a potential threat.
but he was just a jogger.
he noticed i got startled, so he smiled at me, which i appreciate, to show he wasn't a threat.
but i turn my head away from them before even noticing that they smile.
so then i awkwardly have to look back to smile back, and usually by then they already look away from me.
that type of shit...
it just doesn't come natural to me to smile at strangers, and i can often tell me social anxiety rubs off on people lol,
and they start having the same demeanor as myself, like if we are standing next to each other in the supermarket or something.
i smile big whenever i see a dog or even a cat.
but humans... i avoid them as best i can.
i don't remember the last time someone approached me to be my friend,
it's always an act, followed by "hey man btw, do you have 5 bucks?"
i avoid eye contact whenever i can, because eye contact opens up for the chance of conversation, and i know there's a 95% chance i won't like you.
that doesn't make me rude, im just trying to protect my peace,
because whenever in the past i've tried talking to people, it usually ends up bad.
yesterday i was walking without hearing someone running behind me, so he startled me, so naturally i turned my head back very fast,
because i thought he could be a potential threat.
but he was just a jogger.
he noticed i got startled, so he smiled at me, which i appreciate, to show he wasn't a threat.
but i turn my head away from them before even noticing that they smile.
so then i awkwardly have to look back to smile back, and usually by then they already look away from me.
that type of shit...
it just doesn't come natural to me to smile at strangers, and i can often tell me social anxiety rubs off on people lol,
and they start having the same demeanor as myself, like if we are standing next to each other in the supermarket or something.
i smile big whenever i see a dog or even a cat.
but humans... i avoid them as best i can.
i don't remember the last time someone approached me to be my friend,
it's always an act, followed by "hey man btw, do you have 5 bucks?"
