Discussion Do you feel like killing yourself when you make a mistake?

[Lov3]

For example, breaking a TV or an important part of something due to carelessness or an error.
Sometimes I feel so bad about a mistake I made that it overwhelms me, and I want to kill myself. It's a real urge, one that I have to hold back very strongly to avoid acting on impulse. Even though it's something that's hard to actually happen, sometimes it can.

 

[Abyss Dweller]

Sounds like both you and me are being way way too hard on ourselves. I know I got it from my upbringing thank fuck..

Only thing I can say is try to be more forgiving to yourself. Easier said than done I know.. small steps at a time.

All the best to you. :)

 

[spiders.in.my.head]

Yeah. Any small mistake, that disappoints someone around me, makes me feel like I need to be put down like a rabid dog. Not exactly a healthy reaction, but what can you do

 

[Dawns]

Yes. I can feel suicidal from literally the smallest inconvenience. it's exhausting when life is literally full of inconveniences

 

[mjolnir]

Generally, I dwell on certain mistakes for a while; the accumulation of thoughts about these mistakes contributes in some way to my having suicidal thoughts, but it's not the only reason.

 

[Asya]

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[mushroom_blue]

I get this at work a lot, even the smallest fuck up or inconvenience instantly triggers suicidal ideation. I think my wires got all crossed at some point, as my suicidality seems to be directly tied to stress and anxiety, like I've conditioned myself to fantasize killing myself over any minor setback as some sort of coping mechanism.

 

[thelostautistic]

I constantly beat myself up for every memorable mistake I've ever made in my life. I feel like everything is my fault and it would be better if I ctb

 

[Msvr]

The closest Ive got to ctb was after such an incident. I'm normally not one to get physically angry. But once a year ago I was driving to work and was having an already down day, but something I planned to push thru. My phone music app started giving me tons of trouble right as I wanted to listen to a specific calming song. So I went to punch the top of my steering wheel and like slipped/lost control and hit and shattered my windshield. I didnt even feel like Id hit it that hard, but I just no showed to work, went home, sent out my delayed texts, got myself all strapped and one movement away from pulling the exit bag on. The only time Ive gotten as far as sending my delayed texts out.

 

[vyvanceandvodka]

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[ThePainKiller]

Sometimes, but it sucks that they get dragged around my mind to add salt to the wound, leaves me breaking down and overthinking about whats gonna happen next.