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J

jacobryan

Member
Mar 11, 2024
99
When making plans to ctb (or thinking about it), I have found my own SI kicks in and I start doubting my ability to follow through. And then I think about maybe having someone to help me prepare/put me in a position I can't back out would help. Surviving is hard-wired into our brains, so getting past that takes willpower. As much as I believe I want to ctb, I think my SI is still too strong, if that makes sense. Anyone else have similar thoughts?
 
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peristala

peristala

Member
Mar 11, 2024
9
same, if i understood you correctly, then for me it's a bit different. I feel like I'll fail no matter what I try so I search for the most lethal but it still doesn't feel like I'll actually die. that makes me afraid to actually do it so i would also prefer if someone would just shoot me or something
 
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O

Olisop21.

Student
Mar 15, 2024
173
I get what you are saying. Trying to override SI, is so hard.
I'm set on partial hanging, hopefully compressing my carotid arteries so I go unconscious within seconds.
I find no pleasure or joy in life. My self-loathing has pushed so many people away. My NPD has hurt so many kind people in my life. I just need to die.
 
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D

deathslament

Student
Mar 16, 2024
149
I would rather euthanasia but i can only bite the towel and do it myself with some effective method .
 
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J

jacobryan

Member
Mar 11, 2024
99
I get what you are saying. Trying to override SI, is so hard.
I'm set on partial hanging, hopefully compressing my carotid arteries so I go unconscious within seconds.
I find no pleasure or joy in life. My self-loathing has pushed so many people away. My NPD has hurt so many kind people in my life. I just need to die.
I've looked into a few methods, night-night being one of them for the compression or the carotids. I want it to be quick and painless. And if I'm unconscious, there won't be any pain.
 
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O

Olisop21.

Student
Mar 15, 2024
173
I've looked into a few methods, night-night being one of them for the compression or the carotids. I want it to be quick and painless. And if I'm unconscious, there won't be any pain.
Would you share other ways of compression, please.
 
J

jacobryan

Member
Mar 11, 2024
99
Would you share other ways of compression, please.

This is where I found it
 
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C

Chelsea Leng

Student
Feb 3, 2024
139
When making plans to ctb (or thinking about it), I have found my own SI kicks in and I start doubting my ability to follow through. And then I think about maybe having someone to help me prepare/put me in a position I can't back out would help. Surviving is hard-wired into our brains, so getting past that takes willpower. As much as I believe I want to ctb, I think my SI is still too strong, if that makes sense. Anyone else have similar thoughts?
you'll then need a method that knocks you down before your si kicks in. the detergent method may be your right choice.
 
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J

jacobryan

Member
Mar 11, 2024
99
you'll then need a method that knocks you down before your si kicks in. the detergent method may be your right choice.
I'm considering both. But having practiced the night-night with the corn hole bags, and not really passing out when I thought I would, I am leaning that way more and more.
 
theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,319
The SI is strong. But someone preparing you to die doesn't sound easy.
 

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