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Ethereal Knight

Ethereal Knight

Seja um bom soldado, morra onde você caiu.
Jan 10, 2022
816
So I'm not getting a sexual partner this year.

I don't accept this torturous fate. For me, under my circunstances, that's unbearable.

I'm daily tormented by my aloneness and by the fact that I'm a thirstie.

I'm always socially isolated, affection-starved, alone. I eat my feelings by using food as comfort, I numb my mind into oblivion by an internet addiction, which are all very poor substitutes for love.

This is one of the biggest reasons why I'll end my life. There are other reasons, but nothing motivates more than the anguish that comes from this potent mix of huge sexual frustration, meaninglessness and chronic social isolation.

I decided to go rogue and now prioritize my own well-being and wishes – thus no longer acting on the expectations of life and nature: I'll become an agent of my own "natural selection" by extinguishing this body of mine! This is what nature, in its unending selfishness and machiavellianism, keeps on postponing for its own irrational interests — but no more.

1667474874360
 
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almaranthine

almaranthine

Wizard
Nov 28, 2019
615
lack of intimacy is profoundly isolating. on the other hand, meaningless sex can make one feel just as empty. plenty of sexually active people are out there just trying to fill the void inside them. from personal experience, I'm really not sure what's worse... not having anyone or being used for sex, as both have made me feel worthless.

I'm sorry you feel so alone and are suffering. I hope you are able to find peace.
 
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D

darkcirclesunder

Member
Sep 8, 2022
42
Sexlessness can really make one suicidal. For me i deal with endless emptiness because even if i had a willing sexual partner i would probably have ED from years of porn use. I really wish women were more open with the guys they go for. Im really tired if seeing women with only a very tall skinny pretty boy or a round doughboy into anime, as i dont fit into either of these niche's and have lost all my former passions and interests i cant attract anyone. I sefinitely xouldnt have an emotional xonnection anymore as all love inside me has died. I also have a "fake" libido which is fueled by years of porn fetishes but would not know how to have real life sex. Yes, sexlessness leads to a loss of soul and anhedonia. First, the sexlessness comes, when the porn addiction, then the anhedonia, soul death, nit to mention you usually are sexless as a male because a lack of being social and having low self esteem from being neglected and or over seen.

But i will pray for you friend, as you definitely deserve to find some one soon.
 
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Rational man

Rational man

Enlightened
Oct 19, 2021
1,485
It can be incredibly lonely existence. I think my illness marked the end of intamcy for me. I was in a relationship beforehand but like most relationships, they do end or change into a benile existence. Love seems like chasing a 🌈. I feel your pain.
 
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