CTB - Caring

[TheBroken]

I'd like to know how many people, regardless of reason(s) for choosing to exit life (CTB), have a deep feeling of just not caring. Not caring if things you're doing work out, not caring when they do, not caring about really much of anything anymore. I'm talking about the kind of not caring that's way beyond anyone's little labels of depression side effects or other real/imagined malady, I mean just really really not caring anymore. Maybe it's because I'm close to the end already and have my method done/ready, but no matter what happens I just really don't care. Good thing happens - whatever don't care. Worsening health - whatever, don't care. Work/project doesn't turn out ok - whatever, don't care. People try to express care, concern or love - whatever, don't care. It's not an "I'm depressed" kind of don't care, but instead something so deep it's all the way to the bottom of my entire person. Anyway, anyone relate at all or am I just .... crazy?

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Yes this is exactly how I feel… I don't care about anything… Sometimes I have to Fake it …. A family friend passed away and I had to pretend care … I'm sorry if other people are hurting but I don't actually feel anything

 

[TheBroken]

Yes this is exactly how I feel… I don't care about anything… Sometimes I have to Fake it …. A family friend passed away and I had to pretend care … I'm sorry if other people are hurting but I don't actually feel anything

Same - it's so hard to describe. I feel nothing no matter what happens.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

I went to the dentist a few months ago and they told me they had to immediately pull out a tooth but I basically blew it off… At this exact moment I'm hungry but I don't even care enough to get up and go buy food… I'm hoping that somehow all of this will culminate in my body just shutting down… My mind and my heart and my soul have all given up but my body continues to live which is frustrating… If I were an old person I figured I would just die in my sleep

 

[TheBroken]

I went to the dentist a few months ago and they told me they had to immediately pull out a tooth but I basically blew it off… At this exact moment I'm hungry but I don't even care enough to get up and go buy food… I'm hoping that somehow all of this will culminate in my body just shutting down… My mind and my heart and my soul have all given up but my body continues to live which is frustrating… If I were an old person I figured I would just die in my sleep

Interesting - my teeth decided to all move this year and I can hardly chew, but don't care. I swing between overeating and eating nothing for long periods. Also frustrated my body continues going. We'll see how it does without oxygen soon enough. Would love to die during sleep, but no matter what I do to my body or how hard I pray for it I still wake up again each morning to face hell.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Interesting - my teeth decided to all move this year and I can hardly chew, but don't care. I swing between overeating and eating nothing for long periods. Also frustrated my body continues going. We'll see how it does without oxygen soon enough. Would love to die during sleep, but no matter what I do to my body or how hard I pray for it I still wake up again each morning to face hell.

For some reason I still believe that Apathy will eventually kill me but I can imagine it would take a while