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PDAnnie2610

Waiting for my bus.
Oct 27, 2019
701
How do we cope with the pain of living till we can ctb?

Personally, I shouldn't have sought help the day before yesterday because I wasted resources but I think now I'm ready to go in a few weeks. This time round, I won't make the same mistake I did. There will be no phone and any way to contact others. I'm still trying to decide how it can be done without hurting or traumatising others excessively. I'll have to make sure it works because there's no way out of my pain anymore.

I'm hoping that all of us can support each other through our mutual pain before and if we decide to ctb. No pressure to, just that my time approaches and I'm trying to distract myself from the agony.
 
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S

sadnurse

Student
Nov 2, 2021
118
Ice cream helps me
 
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ClownMe

ClownMe

Don't Cry for Me, I'm Already Dead
Apr 7, 2021
20,560
It's hard to cope with the pain, life is so debilitating when you're suicidal, I just try my best to take it one day at a time but it's hard.
 
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wanttogetonthebus

wanttogetonthebus

chronically unlucky
Nov 27, 2021
411
This is a good question 🥺 I fantasize a lot to help cope. Happy memories, CBT, an ideal world, anything that can make me feel better in the moment. It often doesn't work though and sometimes all I feel is sadness and despair my life has turned out like this.
 
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cambrai33

cambrai33

Traveller
Nov 3, 2021
385
I find through planning and detail helps, it's like ensuring success but always feeling that those little details help the final choice as painless as possible.

Making peace helps me too, I am not angry or vengeful, this is my journey and the least it affects others the better I will feel as things draw close

Finally I'm giving help a chance, once this is exhausted I hope my Si will be less than if I had doubts in my mind

I feel empty of emotion yet calm and content
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
48,625
I just put up with the suffering, I have to until I finally get the courage to ctb. Nothing makes me feel better, sometimes thinking about being dead can be comforting though. For me the pain will only end when I die. Living is painful and being alive hurts me.
 
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P

PDAnnie2610

Waiting for my bus.
Oct 27, 2019
701
I just put up with the suffering, I have to until I finally get the courage to ctb. Nothing makes me feel better, sometimes thinking about being dead can be comforting though. For me the pain will only end when I die. Living is painful and being alive hurts me.
Sending you friendly hugs to comfort you.

Here's hoping we can have our peace, be it alive or dead. I think that's what all of us want..
 
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D

Disco Biscuit

Specialist
Mar 1, 2020
350
To be honest, it's having my suicide all planned out that allows me to cope. Whenever I feel anxious about the future or stressed out by other people I remember that it won't matter soon and instantly feel a bit better.

Just by itself without any intention to act on it, it's actually quite an effective, albeit unhealthy, coping mechanism. You have to work with what you've got, I guess.
 
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