Cliché

[johntee2]

Here we go. This is the standard thread where I beg for some way to get N. It's pretty much impossible in Europe. Does A really exist and is he forever changing identity. I'm in ireland which is a nanny state. I do have my hands on a nitrogen cylinder but I have no regulator or tubing to set up the exit bag. The nitrogen cylinder is left over from a party a year and a half ago where they had beer on tap. I presume it is still viable and hasn't leeched out or anything. I can get the regulator on the net maybe but what is the tubing they use? I'd need elastic for the exit bag too. With lockdown, I'm never going to get more than half an hour alone and there is no end in sight for that. Would half an hour be enough for suspension hanging. I'm about 210lbs so should go quickly. As I said before, my SI is intense and I can't tolerate even a hint of suffocation. I envy people who have guns. That would be perfect for me. Just an impulse, pull the trigger and blam. Mornings are unbearable for me. I wake up every day to the fresh realisation that my health is gone forever and that I'm going to die a hideous choking, suffocating cardiac death someday sooner or later. It could take a year. I can't be like this for a year!