Catching the bus tomorrow (ish)

[kingkong57]

I'm catching the bus early hours on Wednesday. CO method mixed with benzos and alcohol. Early hours so no one's around, just need to find a secluded spot where no one will notice the burning charcoal.
humans really suck but I can't help but feel scared at the prospect of time 'healing me over' or erasing me. I know ashes to ashes and all that, (even though I'm a nihilist) but it's true enough, scientifically it seems, to me.

i have no one to say goodbye to. Apart from this website. So goodbye

l hope there's a less painful side awaiting us. Or eternal nothing will do

 

[wanttogetonthebus]

I wish you the best of luck and I'm sure it's the hardest decision you've had to make. Are you afraid you might fail? Also, what did you mean by 'time healing you over' if you don't mind me asking?

 

[Dead Meat]

Best wishes @kingkong57 that you have a very comfortable and pleasant journey. May you find Neverending peace and serenity

 

[kingkong57]

I wish you the best of luck and I'm sure it's the hardest decision you've had to make. Are you afraid you might fail? Also, what did you mean by 'time healing you over' if you don't mind me asking?

Just that of the 107 billion(ish) people that have ever lived on earth, how many do the nearly 8 billion alive today really remember? and who knows how long our species will last. Memories to the ones we know and loved whilst alive, to me are the only thing making lives worth enduring. I think that's the best way I can articulate it - I don't have anyone to remember me, I made sure if it gradually. And yes, I'm terrified I will fail. I think that's what I'm most afraid of, rather than my life being forgotten. I do feel more confident than ever that it's my time to go though.

 

[CrossroadsCurious]

Peace be your journey!

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

Good luck, I hope you find peace.

 

[wanttogetonthebus]

Just that of the 107 billion(ish) people that have ever lived on earth, how many do the nearly 8 billion alive today really remember? and who knows how long our species will last. Memories to the ones we know and loved whilst alive, to me are the only thing making lives worth enduring. I think that's the best way I can articulate it - I don't have anyone to remember me, I made sure if it gradually. And yes, I'm terrified I will fail. I think that's what I'm most afraid of, rather than my life being forgotten. I do feel more confident than ever that it's my time to go though.

I think every rational person would feel the same way - scared that it might fail and what might happen after since once we're unconscious we no longer have any control. It's good that you're ready though. I think that's the most important part of CBT - knowing that one is truly ready for it. Once again, best of luck. If you ever need any company or someone to talk to feel free to message me. Whether you succeed, fail, or change your mind we'll be here for you. Never give up on yourself, your happiness and wellbeing are everything. I'm sorry that life didn't and doesn't care about us.

 

[porhtna]

 

[kingkong57]

I think every rational person would feel the same way - scared that it might fail and what might happen after since once we're unconscious we no longer have any control. It's good that you're ready though. I think that's the most important part of CBT - knowing that one is truly ready for it. Once again, best of luck. If you ever need any company or someone to talk to feel free to message me. Whether you succeed, fail, or change your mind we'll be here for you. Never give up on yourself, your happiness and wellbeing are everything. I'm sorry that life didn't and doesn't care about us.

Thank you for this, I'll message you later today if that's okay

 

[forgotten15]

I wish you freedom from all the suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope you find the peace you are looking for. I wish you the best with your plans.

 

[wanttogetonthebus]

Thank you for this, I'll message you later today if that's okay

Of course it is

 

[kingkong57]

So it hasn't gone to plan. I'm reconsidering my method. I have all I need to die at home and though I'm feeling incredibly guilty for any distress my neighbours may feel, and friends, I feel like it's the most comfortable place for me to ctb. How selfish is that?