Venting Can't ctb after last attempt left me scared but I'm terrified of my impending prison sentence

[Augustburnsred2868]

I don't know what to do. I just want to cease existence. That's all I've ever really wanted. But my last attempt truly traumatized me and now I'm too much of a coward to commit. I just keep watching my entire life get destroyed and then I try to rebuild just to have it destroyed again. This world is madness and I can't take it anymore but I can't get out. I keep hoping I won't wake up one of these days but the chances are slim. I just can't believe that my first criminal offense is going to get me 5 to 10 years. I was out of custody this whole time and tried to get my life back on track and now it's all gonna be ripped out from under me. What was the point? What's the point of anything.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds really awful what you are going through. I wish that we lived in a world where people could just exit peacefully when the time is right for them. I know that this life can be unbearable when you are suffering so much. I hope you find relief from pain in whatever happens.

 

[sad_koala]

what happened with your last try? I don't want to sound prying, you don't have to answer if you don't want to. I'm so sorry for what you're going through

 

[Freedomindeath4me]

That's horrible. So sorry.

 

[WanderingWater]

No hope of probation?

 

[Shu]

Yo I used to love August burns red