Somewhat Suicidal
surviving anhedonia ≠living
- Aug 26, 2026
- 537
And then there's us: "Somehow two voices could be heard joyfully laughing amidst the ambient terror"
776
So who will be in luck next?
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And then there's us: "Somehow two voices could be heard joyfully laughing amidst the ambient terror"
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I'm kind of 'new' to say, to put it in a way.
It's a somewhat curious story, given that I've been registered for nearly eight years...
I'm kind of 'new' to say, to put it in a way.
It's a somewhat curious story, given that I've been registered for nearly eight years...
I second VanillaCakes notion!If you are ever interested to tell us, go ahead!
773
If you are ever interested to tell us, go ahead!
It's not at all, enjoyed reading it although I'm sorry life has brought you back to here at the same time.Sorry if this story sound kind of dumb, and is somewhat long.
It isn't dumb. As you've said, you might've been so focused on ending it all that your mind couldn't focus on the technicals773
Well... Everything happen 8 years ago, when I was looking for 'help' to achieve the 'goal' of ending all of this.
I found this place at a very bad time in my life, and after a very long search through the web. I found this place te be very peaceful, people here are very nice and comprehensive.
Besides that, at the time there was a very great thread for help. Some family and friends came 'to rescue' me at that time. So I ended doing anything, and my plans where frustrated for some other reasons as well. I didn't know back then that some countries require permits to handle dangerous materials. (I know it could sound dumb) I was just really focused on reaching the end.
You're always welcomedI remember that I bookmarked the site and saved it. I use to come here every now and then, because it make me feel safe and I liked to read the stories of others. But after a while I moved on and kept going.
I knew this place was here for me whenever I wanted to come back. At some point I tried to come back from my bookmark, but the site was gone. I was really sad since I thought I have lost my safe place.
Towards the years I keep searching for it, every once in a while. Until last year when I was looking to get some 'help' again, found it. I was so happy! And what made me happier is that my name was still here.
I know that I haven't been able to do what I really want to, and that the thread that was so helpful back in the day is long gone. But the nice people are still here, even knowing that some just hang out here for short periods of time. I feel relieved that I still can come here and feel peace.
It didn't sound dumb at all. And it wasn't that long don't worry!Sorry if this story sound kind of dumb, and is somewhat long. But this is what happened and I'm back now.
It isn't dumb. As you've said, you might've been so focused on ending it all that your mind couldn't focus on the technicals
You're always welcomedI've found sasu to be a pretty open-minded and gentle community.
I'm unsure which thread you're talking about (arrived a tad later than you after all) but you should definitely try to interact on here! If you're interested in recovery, the section is filled with people trying their best to help eachother out.
It didn't sound dumb at all. And it wasn't that long don't worry!
Well, welcome back
773
It's not at all, enjoyed reading it although I'm sorry life has brought you back to here at the same time.
774
Of course it's always sad to see the need for people to come here in the first place... I'm sorry your thoughts haven't changed but I can appreciate that you're still trying771
Thank you! I'm glad to be here once again.
I'm not sure if my point is looking for salvation, since my thoughts haven't change at all. But I'm still hanging in this world.
Of course it's always sad to see the need for people to come here in the first place... I'm sorry your thoughts haven't changed but I can appreciate that you're still trying
No matter your choice, I believe that you won't be alone here. Is there anything that makes life a bit more worth living for you? Whether it be some people, animals, food, activities...
770
You seem extra-harsh on yourself, you're probably nicer than you believe. So far you've been lovely to us here!769
My main reason is that, I don't want to cause that pain to my family, and I'm scared to find a very painful death at the end. Even if I don't know how death will find me, it could be like that at the end in the natural way.
I love my family, and they really love me. I'm not really a nice person in general, but I still receive their love somehow.
You seem extra-harsh on yourself, you're probably nicer than you believe. So far you've been lovely to us here!
We all have our moments but I'm sure you're kinder than meaner overall
768
766767
Thank you!
I just try my best on being a decent human being, even if it is hard. I try not to put it on others, I'm not really good at it since sometimes I lose it completely. But I do my best...
Didn't mean to say bad, but I'm still sad for every single person that feels like we do. That's what I feel sorry about. I would wish for all of us to find the happiness to live fulfilled lives full of love and sense of achievement. Sadly that seems impossible in most cases who find the way here.Please. Do not feel sorry at all, even if I still think the same way as 8 years ago, and the last 22 years. Is not a bad thing.
Of course it's always sad to see the need for people to come here in the first place...
Exactly. to both of theseYou seem extra-harsh on yourself, you're probably nicer than you believe. So far you've been lovely to us here!
You're welcomeSo, thank you! Thanks for making me feel welcomed again![]()
766
I can definitely feel you're trying your best![]()
I just lost it when sending an email for a warranty case and attaching photos of my surf neoprene suit didn't work as it should. Took me half an hour to do it. I feel utterly pathetic and dysfunctional as a human beingI'm not really good at it since sometimes I lose it completely. But I do my best...
you probably meant to say 766?
I just lost it when sending an email for a warranty case and attaching photos of my surf neoprene suit didn't work as it should. Took me half an hour to do it. I feel utterly pathetic and dysfunctional as a human being
you probably meant to say 766?
767