Help Anyone successfully stopped obsessive rumination/spiralling?

[Tumblewillow]

Hey guys!

I'm doing pretty well in my recovery but the one thing that keeps yanking me back to suicidal is a habit of obsessively thinking about the events and confronting or being accepted by the people that caused it.

If I have an emotional flashback I end up spending hours pacing and creating scenarios in which I have been apologized to and everything has been made right, or Im able to scream and cry at them for what they did.

If feels very very addictive. I workout heavy 4x a week (it helps for a few hours) and go to therapy x1 a week, her suggestions are distraction techniques. But it is so so fucking ingrained and hard to stop. I will even pause tv or games to get up and do it without realising I've started doing it!!

I feel like the only person in the world that has this and I'd like to see some light at the end of tunnel

 

[Jdieiejdjaow]

Having rumination is such a pain with anxiety. One way to better manage these thoughts is to build capacity for mindfulness. Starting small (3 minutes a day) as a habit (e.g. before or after brushing teeth) can help. Guided meditations are the best if they are of quality (e g those from headspace - though, I don't recommend using them due to how they treated psychotherapists and their clients¹).

1: latimes.com/business/story/2023-07-07/santa-monicas-headspace-health-laid-off-therapists-patients-dont-know-where-they-went