Anyone reading with extreme anxiety

[IWantToSleep]

You're not alone, I know you read a lot about depression, but I know your pain.

 

[watereyes]

yeah mate i have very bad anxiety, which is why i get high on benzos.

 

[facel]

Yes, I've got terrible anxiety and get attacks several times a day. Am new here too.

 

[Originaldon]

24/7 PTSD driven anxiety

 

[littlelungs]

Severe PTSD and GAD checking in here. Sucks ass. I feel for all of you.

Yes, I've got terrible anxiety and get attacks several times a day. Am new here too.

I'm really sorry that life's circumstances have brought you here, but... welcome.

 

[Gl1tch3d G1rl]

I have anxieties that are so severe that they cause me to develop delusions. Violent ones too. I fucking hate it so darn much!

 

[3xxn]

I feel for everyone in this thread - I have experience with PTSD anxiety and and panic attacks top and wouldn't wish this on anyone, it's truly the worst

 

[i want peace]

Yes anxiety and panic attacks have ruined my life. They've stopped me from doing most things in life for the last 9 years. I'll be glad to be gone and not scared, worried or anxious anymore. I remember somebody once laughing about me making a big deal of how hard it is living with panic attacks. If they had them they'd know the terror is very real. You feel like you're about to die during a panic attack so actually doing it should be a relief hopefully. I've also ended up with so many ridiculous phobias due to anxiety, the list just seems to keep building. Claustrophobia, agoraphobia, fear of bridges and tons more

 

[butterflycollector]

GAD ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ it got a lot better during the time i was in therapy because i was able to control it more but today after my first day back to in-person school i realize it's probably gonna act up again considering how much i hate it there. i havent seen my therapist in months either.

 

[OpheliasFlowers]

I've had severe GAD and PTSD and phobias and panic attacks for most of my life but it's gotten 10000x worse over the last 10 yrs, esp the last 2 yrs. Living always in a state of fear, worry, anxiety and being afraid to do things or go places ( and even eat certain things now, due to my physical medical problems and GI issues ) is draining and has made my life a total living hell. I don't even feel human anymore. I can't sleep barely at all and that's saying something b/c I've always had sleep issues but the insomnia and poor sleep quality has destroyed my quality of life even further. I've tried meds but I'm so sensitive to side effects that no med has really given me relief - it's like I'm only exchanging problem A for problem B. I'm worn out. All the years (decades) of living this way with no relief in sight, no respite, all joy sucked out of living...it's not worth it anymore. My heart goes out to all of you struggling with this too. It's no way to live.

 

[Otto]

Anxiety has ruined my life ,someone just said to me why won't you answer the phone ,you can't keep on blaming anxiety all the time.
If only it was that easy
Ptsd ,gad,social anxiety

 

[Alwaysbadtime]

Yes, I have situational anxiety due to my shitty reality. The drs here don't give a fuck about this and say benzos are dangerous. My anxiety is dangerous. I have never gotten addicted to benzos and I am super pissed by this. My temp literally goes up to 100 going to the dr.

I feel never tired. I take one med to sleep and it helps but even sleep I get no relief.

I used to have anxiety about fatal diseases when I was much younger. I think I was just distracting myself from how shitty things were even then.

 

[OpheliasFlowers]

Yes, I have situational anxiety due to my shitty reality. The drs here don't give a fuck about this and say benzos are dangerous. My anxiety is dangerous. I have never gotten addicted to benzos and I am super pissed by this. My temp literally goes up to 100 going to the dr.

I feel never tired. I take one med to sleep and it helps but even sleep I get no relief.

I used to have anxiety about fatal diseases when I was much younger. I think I was just distracting myself from how shitty things were even then.

My temp goes up too when I'm anxious. I've Googled about this and not found much clarification if that's a 'common' occurrence from anxiety/stress so while I'm so sorry you go through what you do w/ anxiety, it's comforting to know that it's not just me this temperature thing happens to.

My anxiety is largely situational too, and I had a psychiatrist back in 2013 who started me on .05 Ativan 3x daily. I resisted taking them for quite awhile. Finally in desperation for relief I tried them and they did help. But this guy was a lousy psych (I Googled him at one point and he had TONS of reviews saying what a flake and quack he was, and eventually he got fired from the clinic I was going to). Anyway he kept upping my dose despite my worrying about getting addicted and I'm not a 'meds' person to start with, so I wanted off of them but he'd keep saying 'we could discuss that at the next appointment', which never happened. My PCP tapered me off the Ativan and it took 8 mos b/c I wanted to go as slow as possible. Then something else traumatic happened and now I've been on Klonopin for 2 yrs and my current psych is tapering me off of those and now all I want is to stay on them, even though they don't do much for me (not like the Ativan did). I wish I could stay at a certain dosage of Ativan (NOT Klonopin) as, at the beginning of taking them, I almost felt NORMAL for once...meaning, the shaking, the constant feelings of fear and doom and tension eased, and I was at least able to function to get to other appointments - it was amazing to feel almost normal again, but never go up in dosage and it wouldn't lose effectiveness. Id stay on Ativan for the rest of my miserable life then. I know benzos have their dangers but for some people, they can GIVE A PERSON THEIR LIFE BACK. It's not fair they won't give people like you, whose quality of life could be so improved, a chance at relief. I hope there is another kind of medication you can find that will help you find that relief, and allow you to sleep.

I understand also about the anxiety about fatal diseases. When I was a kid I DEFINITELY did that. My mom worked in the medical field and always had medical texts at home and I can't tell how many times I'd look through them and how many illnesses and diseases I was genuinely sure I had after reading about symptoms in those books. :( I can see now in retrospect it was a way to redirect my anxiety and worries about living my dysfunctional house/family. But it sure did a number on me. Now I just have major anxieties about all the actual physical health problems I have... sigh

Anyway, sorry to go off about myself. I do relate so much to what you're dealing with and I hope very much somehow you'll find relief from the anxiety, and will be able to sleep. Sending you tons of support. <3

 

[Midgardsorm]

A few days ago I had an extreme anxiety crisis, I couldn't lie down, sit down, read, concentrate, work, do anything. I was just walking nonstop like if I had some kind of hyperactivity, my thoughts were completely messed up and my heart were beating very fast. I made some tea, tried a bit of breathing exercises but it didn't work. I was starting to get really upset.

Then I started to feel something strange, like if my mind just couldn't stand to be in my body anymore, I was shaking my head seemingly trying to simply snap out of it or "wake up" from that nightmare. It got so bad that I started repeatedly punching myself in the head, even got a bruise next to my eye. Self-Harming at it's finest with my bare fists. I got a mild headache and started getting a little dizzy because of the punches and then I panicked even more.

I went to a hospital and had to wait like 2h to see the doctor (It's not a clinic, it's a hospital. it's not a scheduled medical appointment, it's the emergency and yet I had to Sign papers, twice, explain my situation to 3 different persons that asked "Hi, What can I do for you?".

Finally were taken the medication room were they injected me with some Diazepam. I dozed off for some time and woke up and hour later with a nurse calling me.
I were feeling way better. I talked to the doctor, asked for some benzo prescription to take home but he didn't got it because he didn't had the prescription papers.

I went home, talked to a friend of my family that reluctantly gave me clonazepam, just in case I had another crisis.
The storm has passed, but now I have a glimpse of what is really like to have ptsd. I can't even remember that day without getting worried that the feeling might come back.

I got the medication with me, but I'm still worried. I don't deserve that to anyone. That horrible feeling of simply wanting to "wake up". It pains me to remember.

 

[Idontrecognizemyself]

Grateful to see folks with similar experiences. At baseline I have GAD, pure O-OCD, panic disorder, and agoraphobia. Any medication I've been put on does help with those symptoms (a ton! I become actually functional!), but pushes me into a deep depressive & suicidal numbness with some paranoia mixed in too just for fun. I feel lost and hopeless for a solution in my own life. I hope we can be a kind and helpful community to one another : )

 

[xyzasd]

Severe social anxiety destroyed my carreer, love life and social connections, everything