Looking back, I've literally never had a single loyal person in my life. Even my own family bullied me relentlessly. So I was used to not having anyone. I didn't care about being alone. At school, I never so much as looked anyone in the eyes and most days I wouldn't pronounce a sentence.
I don't know exactly how, but the emptiness got to me and I attempted socializing. Of course, I've no idea how to socialize because I had a dogshit social upbringing. My misery increased ten-fold as I started asphyxiating on my own loneliness.
Though I'm pretty sure that if my social life weren't so shitty it wouldn't have changed much, since my dissatisfaction with life comes from many places.