ANY THOUGHTS?

[StarryStarry]

Please forgive me for posting so much. I'm completely alone and I am desperate for someone to talk to. I go for months without seeing or speaking to anyone and just need to know that even one person cares about me. I'm so overwhelmed with grief and sadness I can't function. I want to die so badly, but there is a part of me that wants to live (I don't know why). I am having a huge battle within myself. I think I'm afraid to ctb because I'll screw it up and be a vegetable. I want to die peacefully. Lost my job in August and have been unemployed ever since. I am running out of money. I received a job offer but it's about 3000 miles away. I've called numerous moving trucks but they are all too expensive. I thought of renting a U-haul, but I'm afraid to drive by myself (with Sweet Pea) through bad weather and mountains dragging my car behind (I've never done this). I don't know what to do. Honestly if Sweet Pea were not here, it would be an easy choice, but I'm having a hard time thinking of leaving her behind. I can ask the vet to take her but she may not be able to then Sweet Pea would go to the pound and be euthanized. I couldn't live with myself if that happened.

If anyone here has any thoughts it would be much appreciated. I'm so depressed and sad I can't think.

 

[Onthe29th]

Can your employer help pay for your travel expenses? Some jobs wil do that if it means they have staff .

 

[DasDasDAS]

3000 miles is a long ride but I think there must be a safe way for you to drive her... Ways to go without a considerable risk of permanent damage do exist but yeah it's hard to leave a pet behind especially if something bad might happen to them. I'm sorry you're going through this... It seems you can make it alright. If you feel like talking just to kick the loneliness for a few minutes feel free to PM me!

 

[StarryStarry]

Can your employer help pay for your travel expenses? Some jobs wil do that if it means they have staff .

They offered to pay $1,000. I'm terrified of riding in a u-haul in the snow by myself. But if I don't do this I have no other choice than to ctb

 

[little helpers]

They offered to pay $1,000. I'm terrified of riding in a u-haul in the snow by myself. But if I don't do this I have no other choice than to ctb

an idea that's most likely just a shower thought:
post on Handshake you need a driver and some kid on college loans might actually sign up for a small pay.

I'm sorry everything is falling apart for you rn. I'm here if you wanna talk. *hugs*

 

[Onthe29th]

They offered to pay $1,000. I'm terrified of riding in a u-haul in the snow by myself. But if I don't do this I have no other choice than to ctb

That's understandable, I think there are services where you can find people to do it for you. Idk if Uber and Lyft do it…I know taskrabbut helps people move but I don't know if they'll drive there but it's worth a try. Good luck