We wanted to share a quick update with the community.
Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.
👉 View the ledger here
Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.
If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.
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I empathize. I quit two "very good" jobs because I couldn't force myself to make it out the door in the morning. This might be harder for you because you're still out there working, but I've found a way to be able to shop for necessities despite my overwhelmingly debilitating social anxiety. As soon as I get out of my car at the grocery store... I look straight ahead with that slightly out-of-focus perspective (like you're beginning to cross your eyes). I used to be a VERY friendly person, greeting everyone I crossed paths with. But this new way of being is far less exhausting. I know I seem aloof or at least strange, but I've got to do what I've got to do. I can walk around a giant store in a sort of bubble because, other than for safety reasons..., I don't even SEE faces anymore--just anthropoid blobs. I'm probably sharing too much here, but today I went shopping and was so removed from the human community all around me (packed store) that a woman had to yell at me FIVE TIMES to get my attention to help her get something off a very high shelf.
The only thing that helped me was Escitalopram 10mg, It's an antidepressant I take it daily since 1 year and it cured my social anxiety 100%. Still avoid any contact with humans tho because I hate em.
I don't have insurance to see a doctor where I live but I asked someone to help me out with Lexapro or similar. If I could only take care of my social anxiety, life could be so much easier. I work from home now to not be around others, pay sucks bad though.
I'll be trying Lexapro through someone else who has it at home. No idea what to expect with an SSI but I can't get any worse at this point.
Apathy is a dangerous thing, I tend to zone out for weeks and can't get back to normal. I don't have insurance to cover therapy and wait lists for free community clinic psychiatrists are a year long cause of Covid. I tried that.
Thank you. It's not very fun to live with this. I ruined my entire life after graduating with a perfect BBA. My SA wouldn't let me accept good job offers, I voluntarily stayed in an abuse relationship for years cause I thought I deserved it for some reason. I had a childhood from hell with barely food to eat or clothes to wear. My mother purposely did it to me so when I got older I didn't know how to stop the cycle other than going to school. I left the relationship but I'm stuck now with a low wage job cause I believe I can't do better. I still think ctb is the only solution to get out of it. Fighting the urge every day.
