another anxious cry 4 help

[okkkk]

Anxiety controls my life. I feel like people are honestly surprised by my lack of self confidence and my overall shyness. I think i look like I should be proud or at least okay. I find it extremely pathetic. It is obviously a learned way of being based on events in my childhood. Its such a shame. And it tears me apart that I am missing out on so much richness in life. I am otherwise pretty mentally high functioning.

I am scheduling an appointment to go see a psychiatrist to plead my case on how much this affliction throttles me. If we dont come to some kind of treatment that isnt the first SSRI they pull out of a hat then I think im just going to buy Xanax or Ativan by other means. Ive heard good things about BuSpar as well. Everything I lack is beyond a barrier of fear. Regardless of the effects on my body, I must learn what it is to live without fear.

 

[Shero]

Hey, i have severe anxiety as well, and feel with you. I personally got prescribed Xanax to manage my desire to always isolate myself. Of course, it is a constant battle with yourself to not really conquer it, but to manage it. I hope you find something that diminishes your distress.

 

[KiraLittleOwl]

Anxiety controls my life. I feel like people are honestly surprised by my lack of self confidence and my overall shyness. I think i look like I should be proud or at least okay. I find it extremely pathetic. It is obviously a learned way of being based on events in my childhood. Its such a shame. And it tears me apart that I am missing out on so much richness in life. I am otherwise pretty mentally high functioning.

I am scheduling an appointment to go see a psychiatrist to plead my case on how much this affliction throttles me. If we dont come to some kind of treatment that isnt the first SSRI they pull out of a hat then I think im just going to buy Xanax or Ativan by other means. Ive heard good things about BuSpar as well. Everything I lack is beyond a barrier of fear. Regardless of the effects on my body, I must learn what it is to live without fear.

Be careful with benzodiazepines, I heard countless horror stories about side effects of the long term use.
Maybe you can try daily meditation, breathing practices, yoga and CBD?
Maybe psychotherapy can help you to deal with childhood trauma.
Anxiety is horrible to live with and hard to get reed of, I know it first-hand.
Good luck with your recovery!!