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bladeeluvr444

bladeeluvr444

Trying to Find Forever peace
Dec 18, 2024
55
I've made another post about this before but I cannot shake the pain of just constantly missing people and them NEVER missing me. It's like I can't let go of people who were once so special to me no matter what I do. I always hope they will randomly one day add me back and we will get to become friends again as pathetic as that is. I've been trying to make new friends but I don't feel like I can relate very well to anyone and I don't have a connection with anyone, It's painful and lonely :') It's part of the reason I want to ctb I do not want to get attached to another person and for us to become strangers again the pain is too much
 
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K

Kbeau

Specialist
Jan 17, 2021
331
I've made another post about this before but I cannot shake the pain of just constantly missing people and them NEVER missing me. It's like I can't let go of people who were once so special to me no matter what I do. I always hope they will randomly one day add me back and we will get to become friends again as pathetic as that is. I've been trying to make new friends but I don't feel like I can relate very well to anyone and I don't have a connection with anyone, It's painful and lonely :') It's part of the reason I want to ctb I do not want to get attached to another person and for us to become strangers again the pain is too much
I'm sorry for your pain
 
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encore

encore

she/her • BPD • rOCD
Nov 14, 2024
165
i get very attached to people too, it feels like im cursed to remember everyone who has ever been in my life. im stuck deeply missing the only person who has every truly seen me, and i know i will suffer forever without them. i understand how you feel :(
 
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Breebly

Breebly

Member
Feb 17, 2025
9
I know exactly how you feel, but it's more like I miss the past version of myself and them. People change irreversibly, and it kills me that my memories of them don't and will never again line up w the reality of who they are presently. The most important person in my life became the most hated to where I get sick just from seeing them, but in my dreams it's still them accompanying me. Deep in my core, I can't ever stop missing that version of them when we were close, but all it'll ever be is dreams bc the reality is that they don't miss or even care about me, not when they're the person who hurt me the most. All that to say that unfortunately your and my pain are unlikely to ever fade, but your feelings are understood wholly.
 
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theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,238
Me too
 
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Rational man

Rational man

Enlightened
Oct 19, 2021
1,485
Really sorry to hear this because I found myself in exactly the same situation. I think i developed a difficult connection to people because I was abandoned emotionally by my parents. I would get emotionally attached to other men in particular but then they would move on with their life and family. I realised this painful truth around 18 Years old, the time when I disowned my paternal family due to abuse and deception, I began to feel less attadhed to people and more comfortable with me and my own company. I guess I realise everything is impermanence and im okay with that.
I've made another post about this before but I cannot shake the pain of just constantly missing people and them NEVER missing me. It's like I can't let go of people who were once so special to me no matter what I do. I always hope they will randomly one day add me back and we will get to become friends again as pathetic as that is. I've been trying to make new friends but I don't feel like I can relate very well to anyone and I don't have a connection with anyone, It's painful and lonely :') It's part of the reason I want to ctb I do not want to get attached to another person and for us to become strangers again the pain is too much
 
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Reactions: RinneOfAragon, Breebly and bladeeluvr444
opheliaoveragain

opheliaoveragain

Global Mod
Jun 2, 2024
2,073
i def relate. I feel like it's impossible for people to meet me halfway or make an effort even though I go out of my way for others. you're not alone OP we're here for you 🫂🫂
 
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Reactions: Reflection, RinneOfAragon and bladeeluvr444

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