I would had ceased existing a long time ago if I had the option to peacefully free myself from this existence I personally always saw as the most terrible mistake as all I hope for is to not exist, non-existence is all I see as desirable and positive and I'd just never wish for the suffering and cruelty of this futile, torturous existence rather all I hope for is to not exist and I find it so horrific how a human can suffer for so long just to be tortured in agony by old age.
For me non-existence would solve everything and is the only peace and relief, I just wish for no more pain and no more suffering rather I just want to never exist ever again, I'm just so tired of being burdened with this existence and I'd never wish to be conscious of anything at all rather I only hope for non-existence, I just find it the most terrible tragedy how this existence was even imposed. I'd never wish for this existence that just causes so much suffering all for the sake of it and problems there were never a need for, I always suffer so much from how peaceful guaranteed death is so cruelly denied for me with the suffering of existing seen as to force and prolong no matter what.
