will i run out of things to say

[jamie_]

i always thought i would quit onced i had run out of things to say to them. once no new memories that caused sadness, love, anger, the like would appear. but i feel like eventually i always get something new to say or in a new better way to say it. that's the only thing that's been holding me back but now i guess i'm going to quit now anyway? idk.
Like even now just in between writing this, ive already thought and typed out another thing i felt i needed to express to her which i would have not otherwise if i was not here. i guess it doesn't change anything but the 1% chance it did i would never see? maybe it's just me getting cold feet now my day is upon me?

 

[September5th]

I understand you. I too have this urge to both fix things and also spit some truths. I too think about it the whole time. But there's nothing I can do. I had my chance with her (it was a literal miracle, no jokes) and I wasted it. The best I can do now is to stay in silence. At least I still have my pride and, frankly, after we broke up, keep talking made her hate me.